


Love Is a Losing Game

by afrostpatternintherain



Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cold Weather, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Mates, Misunderstandings, Nausea, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Scars, Slow Burn, idiots to lovers, the brothers will appear later on, this is not mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:08:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 39,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26946460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afrostpatternintherain/pseuds/afrostpatternintherain
Summary: "It was one foolish night where Lucifer had let his emotions slip.Nothing more than that.How everything had turned into this big mess that seemed to be his life right now, Lucifer couldn't quite tell. The fortunes must really like tormenting him, he mused as he was sprawled over a toilet seat, nauseous to the core."Under certain circumstances, demons can form mating bonds. A bond which marks you as someone's mate is purely emotional and does not impact your physical attributes. After an eventful night, Lucifer finds himself in an unexpected dilemma.
Relationships: Diavolo & Lucifer (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Diavolo/Lucifer (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)
Comments: 92
Kudos: 308





	1. Seasons Change

It was one foolish night where Lucifer had let his emotions slip. Nothing more than that. How everything had turned into this big mess that seemed to be his life right now, Lucifer couldn't quite tell. The fortunes must really like tormenting him, he mused as he was sprawled over a toilet seat, nauseous to the core.

It was Friday night and for once, Lucifer was free since he had finished all of his work right on time . Normally, he would have additional paperwork to go through because of his brothers' wrongdoings but for once, they had miraculously behaved this week.

Sitting in front of his desk, Lucifer stretched his aching muscles until he could hear his bones pop in a satisfying manner. It had been a while since he'd had a week this relaxing.

Slowly, he started to clean up his desk, filing away papers and retrieving all the stray pens and paper clips that were spread out on his desk. Just as he finished, the doors to his study flew wide open.

Unfazed, Lucifer looked up to see who had intruded ever so rudely. He was used to his brothers barging in like that from time to time, seeking him out with foolish requests and random nonsense.

This time however, it was none other than Lord Diavolo himself. Honestly, Lucifer found himself less surprised than he'd expected himself to be.

„Lucifer!“ Diavolo crossed the room with confident steps until he stopped right in front of Lucifer's desk, slamming his hands onto the table with too much energy. „Word says you're free today?“ he asked with a smile on his face.

„Good evening, Diavolo. You are correct, I've just finished all my tasks,“ he answered, standing up. Diavolo simply smiled at him and for a moment, there was an awkward silence between them. With a sigh, Lucifer crossed his arms and gave in. You really had to pull everything out of this man's nose. How troublesome. „Why are you asking?“

„Well, we haven't been able to meet up much recently, so I was thinking dinner at Ristorante 6? What do you think?“

Lucifer thought it over for a second. Indeed, they hadn't been out in a while.

„Sounds good. Just let me get changed and then I'm ready to go.“

A big grin spread over Diavolo's face. „I'll accompany you to your chambers, if that's alright.“

„Of course.“

They left together and while Diavolo waited in front of Lucifer's chambers, Lucifer quickly changed into his everyday wear and fixed his hair. For the first time in weeks the reflection in the mirror didn't look sleep deprived and tired, but rather lively almost.

He joined Diavolo and together, they made their way towards Ristorante 6.

„Lord Diavolo, Lucifer! What a pleasant surprise!“ the waiter forced out nervously as he bowed deeply, his body forming a perfect ninety degree angle. „The usual table?“

„Yes, that would be the one, thank you.“

The waiter lead them to their usual table, a table for two which was located in the back of the room, granting them a little bit of privacy. After all, Lord Diavolo and Lucifer were quite well known and respected around Devildom. However, that never stopped curious demons and reporters from being nosy. Especially the reporters were like vultures looking for their next title stories, so Diavolo and Lucifer had to be cautious.

They ordered their food and chatted about everything and nothing, enjoying each other's company. Minutes turned into hours and before they'd noticed, hours had passed.

„It's getting quite late. I think it's time we head back,“ Lucifer finally said and Diavolo nodded in agreement. He paid for both their meals under Lucifer's protests and left the waiter a charitable tip.

The night air was crisp now as seasons were slowly changing. Lucifer shivered slightly as the cold air hit his cheeks.

Diavolo, au contraire, wasn't bothered whatsoever. Due to his astounding powers he was constantly warm, his body radiating heat like an oven.

Although Lucifer was a demon through and through, it was undeniable that his circumstances were slightly different from Diavolo's. Truth was, to Lucifer's dismay, certain aspects from his former life as an angel had stubbornly remained.

Heaven had always been neither cold nor hot, but rather clean and bright and neutral. Angels rarely experienced different seasons except for when they visited earth, so there had never been the necessity for their bodies to adjust much. The weather changes in Devildom however were brutal and quick in nature.

Soon after his fall from heaven Lucifer had realized that despite him being a demon now, that part of his former nature hadn't changed; his body's heat regulation was definitely lacking and barely existent. Refusing to confess this weakness of his, Lucifer hadn't told anyone about it, not Barbatos and certainly not Diavolo.

Even though Lucifer had kept quiet about it by now Diavolo had probably figured it out though. When you've known somebody for decades you tend to notice little details like that.

Subconsciously, Lucifer rubbed his hands together, trying to create warmth as his breath showed in icy puffs in the air. Of course, he could just cast a fire spell, but that would be way too obvious now, wouldn't it? With an annoyed tut he buried his hands in his coat pockets as he strolled down the dark streets, Diavolo close nearby.

All of a sudden, Diavolo pressed his side closer to Lucifer and smoothly let one of his hands slip into Lucifer's coat pocket. Warm fingers interlaced with icy ones.

„Diavolo, what is the meaning of this?“ Lucifer asked with furrowed brows, feeling Diavolo's body heat warming him up little by little.

„It's fine, no one will notice.“ He nodded towards their hands. „See?“ Diavolo's hand firmly grasped Lucifer's, hidden in the folds of his coat pocket, making it look as if they were simply walking a bit too close to each other.

Lucifer's heart skipped a beat and abashedly, he tore his gaze off the coat pocket. With a sigh, he let it slide. He was too cold to argue and deep down, he didn't mind this at all. Not that he would ever admit that out loud though.

„Fine, just this once,“ he grumbled as he turned his head, hiding an ever so slight smile on his face.

It was a thirty minute walk to the house of lamentation, but in good company, it felt much shorter than that.

As Lucifer and Diavolo arrived and he begrudgingly let go of Lucifer's hand, Diavolo lingered in front of the gates. Lucifer turned around to him, his cold fingers resting on the doorknob.

“Today was nice, wasn't it?” Diavolo mused. “Did you have fun, Lucifer?” His eyes shone piercingly in the dark of the night.

Lucifer tried not to shiver too noticeably as he let go of the doorknob and paid full attention to Diavolo again. “Of course,” he answered as he hid his hands in his pockets. “It's been a while since I could take it slow for an entire evening, so thank you.”

“No need to thank me! I'm just glad you had fun! However, it's pretty late already and I'm afraid I have a request to ask of you,” Diavolo started, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. “Would it be too much to ask if I could stay over tonight? It's cold and I don't feel like walking back home.”

Lucifer raised an eyebrow in silent question but didn't inquire any further.

Normally, he would've sent Diavolo home, used to his sudden childish outbursts and outlandish requests. Tonight however, he felt quite comfortable and relaxed, so he decided it would be fine to humour Diavolo this once.

“I will ask one of the servants to prepare one of the guest rooms. It might take some time though.”

A lazy smile spread on Diavolo's lips and he grabbed Lucifer's shoulders, letting his hands linger for a moment too long. “That's my Lucifer, thank you!”

Lucifer coughed into his hand. “Diavolo, didn't I-”

“Why don't we go inside then?” the demon prince interrupted Lucifer, way too energetic for that time of the day.

After Lucifer had informed the servants of Diavolo's sudden stay and was informed that the preparations would take them an hour at most, the two of them made their way up to Lucifer's chambers.

During daytime they would've spent their time waiting in the music room, but since it was night and Lucifer didn't want to wake his brothers or Yuuta, he took Diavolo up to his chambers.

Diavolo immediately threw himself onto Lucifer's bed without asking for permission, laughing as he spread his arms in a childish manner.

“Diavolo, should you, our future king, really act like that?” Lucifer asked as he mustered him exasperatedly. A sigh escaped his lips as he ran his hand through his hair. Over and over again he was surprised by Diavolo's carefree behaviour. Whether he was amazed or appalled, he couldn't quite say.

“Come on Lucifer! We're both off duty, so it's fine!”

“Don't you act the exact same way when you're on duty?”

Diavolo waved it off as he closed his eyes and relaxed. “There's nothing wrong with being honest,” he said with a smile on his face.

Lucifer simply sighed, deciding to let it drop. He felt a shiver run through his body and as he rubbed his arms, he weighed his options. After all, Lucifer knew his body wouldn't warm up as quickly as it should and due to their thirty minute walk home, he felt about ready to turn into an ice statue.

Option one was simple; wait it out until Diavolo's room was prepared and hope he wouldn't show any signs of hypothermia until then. Option two was the more honest one; he could just get changed into something warm and admit defeat when it was due.

After a moment of deliberation Lucifer decided on option number two. After all, he was quite sure Diavolo had caught on already. At this point, it was just Lucifer confirming his suspicions.

“If you don't mind, I'll get changed quickly,” he simply said, making his way towards his wardrobe as he saw Diavolo giving him a thumbs up from the bed.

 _This man_.

Lucifer randomly grabbed the first thick turtleneck he found and

took off his waistcoat and dress shirt. For a moment, he just stood there, shirtless and freezing, when he suddenly felt another presence behind him.

“Diavolo, what are you doing?” he asked, not having to check whether he was right in his assumption or not. There was no demon with a presence even remotely similar to Diavolo's. Lucifer had spent year upon year with his demon prince, so by now he could recognize him by scent and presence in his sleep.

Suddenly, Lucifer felt warm fingers tracing over his back. They seemed to follow a certain pattern, carefully tracing raised skin with soft fingertips. The warmth of Diavolo's hands almost felt like fire on Lucifer's cool, porcelain skin.

With the softest of touches, Diavolo ran his fingers along the edges of Lucifer's scars; scars which were the only thing left where once there had been a majestic pair of pure white wings.

Lucifer stopped in his tracks as he realized what exactly Diavolo was doing, his head slightly lowered.

To this day, Lucifer could still remember the feeling of his wings being ripped off his body, could remember the terrible cracking sound filling his eardrums before the pain set in; a last flash of excruciating white before Lucifer plummeted into the comforting darkness.

Now all that was left were those memories and jagged scars.

Lucifer didn't move as Diavolo explored those scars of the past, almost caressing them.

This was the first time Lucifer had allowed anyone to see his scars so close up front, let alone touch them. Why he granted Diavolo this right, he didn't know. At any point, he could have interfered and asked Diavolo to stop. Truth was, deep down Lucifer felt safe enough with Diavolo to let him come that close.

He still shivered as Diavolo explored his back with kind hands.

Suddenly, Diavolo froze in his tracks as he spotted the thick turtleneck Lucifer had picked out. His eyes narrowed for a second before he realized how cold Lucifer had felt to his touch. Generally, Lucifer always had a chilly aura surrounding him, but today, his skin felt downright icy.

Diavolo softly grabbed him by the shoulders, making him turn around. He mustered him from head to toe before speaking up. “Lucifer, your lips are blue. Are you sure you're-”

Lucifer's cheeks were dusted pink, standing in stark contrast to his fair skin. “I'm fine,” he grumbled, but was ultimately betrayed by his chattering teeth.

“Fine, my ass!” Diavolo exclaimed as he pushed Lucifer forward by his shoulders. “You're coming with me, this is an order.”

Lucifer tried to protest as Diavolo pushed him onto the bed, climbing onto it after him. Before Lucifer could act up Diavolo grabbed a blanket, threw it around them and pulled Lucifer close to him, flush against his chest. He had Lucifer in a deadlock grip, arms wrapped tightly around Lucifer's midsection as Diavolo's knees touched the inside of Lucifer's.

“Diavolo!” Lucifer protested, but couldn't help but notice the way his body lost a bit of its stiffness as he was surrounded by Diavolo's warm body. “Is this your idea of a joke?”

Diavolo pulled Lucifer even closer. “Nope. I'm keeping you right here until you've warmed up, since you seem to refuse to take care of yourself.”

Lucifer felt Diavolo's ever so hot breath graze his neck and shivered, but in a way entirely different than before.

“I do take care of myself,” he protested, which earned him one of Diavolo's trademark laughs.

“That was a good one, tell another one! Lucifer, you are the most competent demon I know but I've never seen you put your health first, not even once. So it's my duty to make sure you are not overdoing it.”

“Diavolo, I can assure you-”

Diavolo pressed his face into the crook of Lucifer's neck, shutting him up immediately as his lips momentarily grazed cold skin.

“Just let me take care of you for once,” he mumbled against Lucifer's neck.

Lucifer could feel his skin heat up where Diavolo's skin met his. His thoughts flashed back to moments before, to the way Diavolo had caressed his scars without any hesitation, without any judgement.

Quickly, he turned around in Diavolo's arms, now facing him. His eyes roamed over Diavolo's face, searching for an answer in his prince's eyes. Why would Diavolo go to such lengths and beyond? Was he trying to tease Lucifer or was he being genuine right now? Did he maybe have an entirely different goal in mind?

“What is your goal here?” he finally asked, torn between the comfort he found in Diavolo's warmth and his own inability to fully understand his superior's motives. “Why would you even-” he stopped as his eyes met Diavolo's and he found himself painfully aware of the situation they were in right now. This was way beyond your regular work relationship. He could feel the rise and fall of Diavolo's chest against his own naked one, could feel Diavolo's warm arms wrapped around his body. Lucifer was painfully aware of the way Diavolo looked back at him with a certain twinkle in his golden eyes.

Holding eye contact, Diavolo grabbed Lucifer's face with one hand and mustered him. “How haven't you noticed?” he mumbled, cheeks slightly red.

Ever so slowly, he closed the distance between them, stopping as he saw Lucifer freeze for a second. Before he could pull back again there was a change in Lucifer's eyes and the demon brought his hands up to the back of Diavolo's neck. Encouraged, Diavolo pressed his lips against Lucifer's. Slowly, he moved his lips and was delighted to see Lucifer reciprocate. Cold lips quickly heated up with passion as soft kisses tuned into more sloppy ones.

They spent their night taking delight in each other's bodies, leaving rough marks and blushing hickeys all over. As if a dam had broke, they completely lost themselves in passion, lost themselves in swollen lips, bruised hipbones and scratches down his back, lost themselves in their own world, pent up until they finally both found refuge in an ultimate union.

It was early in the morning hours when Diavolo hastily dressed himself, throwing one last look back at Lucifer's sleeping face.

Regret filled his chest as he looked down at the demon he had slept with hours prior.

“I'm sorry, Lucifer,” he mumbled as he pressed one last chaste kiss to his cheek. “Forgive me.”

He pulled the doors shut behind him as he made his way down the hallway, away from his right hand man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, welcome to another episode of this was supposed to be a oneshot but i just can't keep my mouth shot so whoops i guess! This was fun to write, although i was a bit stuck around the middle part. I literally wrote half of the next chapter before i finished the middle part of this chapter.  
> As always i feel like i should say sorry to Lucifer but on the other hand he's kind of a dick himself so i feel less guilty putting him through hell all over again. Don't take me too seriously i actually like him xD  
> Anyway, thank you for reading, i'd appreciate comments, kudos or criticism, so don't feel shy! Stuff like that makes me happy!  
> If you want to check out my social media you can find me on tumblr @leviathanswingman or on twitter @simpingshrimp .  
> Have a nice day y'all!!


	2. Something Strange Is Happening

Lucifer awoke to aching hips and an empty bed. Eyes fluttered open as the palm of his hand ghosted over icy silk sheets. Stiff fingers buried themselves in the delicate fabric, bunching it up and leaving messy wrinkles behind.

 _Diavolo was gone_ , Lucifer noted with cold detachment.

So after all, it had been that easy of a decision. Not once had Lucifer even entertained the thought that it would be so easy to solve this year old game of hide and seek of theirs, and not once had he thought the decision would be up to anyone but himself.

Diavolo had taken their fate in his own hands and had decided for the both of them, once and for all. In the span of mere hours he had captured Lucifer just to let him go in an act of pretentious kindness. After decades upon decades, the tension between them had been cut by the fates, a nimble string of uncertainty severed with surgical preciseness.

One night, one snip of sharpened blades. A change so subtle, yet so detrimental.

After all, this was how it had always been supposed to end.

Thoughts still muddled with sleep, Lucifer found himself in a conflicted state of mind. He couldn't find it in his heart to feel unbothered, even though he knew he was expected to act in that sort of manner. Hell, he himself expected a cold, detached reaction from himself. However, Lucifer wasn't as good at regulating his emotions as he wished himself to be.

What had he expected? Right from the beginning he'd known he was taking a gamble he would inevitably lose. Still, foolishly he had given in to temptation and now here he was.

Alone on a cold bed, in a room that should give him comfort, but now, with the lacking presence of Diavolo, felt soulless and empty.

No matter what, Lucifer had undeniably put a dent in his relationship to Diavolo. Ever before that day, he had acted as their self appointed chaperone, had made sure to keep things civil and right and ever so appropriate between them. Yesterday however, he had failed this self appointed duty of his oh so miserably.

Seeing how things were, this had been nothing more than a one night stand for Lord Diavolo. Otherwise, he wouldn't have left Lucifer to his own devices, tangled up in those frozen sheets. Worst of all was, Lucifer couldn't fault him for it.

He had always been aware of Diavolo's attraction to him. After all, sneaking glances and prolonged eye contact were hard to miss after several decades.

Right from the beginning, Diavolo had always sent mixed signals and Lucifer had always been somewhat curious to find out what the nature of his feelings actually was. Today, he had finally received his answer. Diavolo's feelings towards him had never been anything more than carnal ones.

Not that there was anything wrong with that, they were demons after all. Lust wasn't something they were neither unfamiliar nor uncomfortable with.

Lucifer had never been preposterous enough to consider any other possibility, had never been preposterous enough to expect more than he was allowed to take. Lingering feelings were always followed by a calculated reality check. Still, why was his heart now aching with this unexpected pain?

Lucifer let out a frustrated groan and ran the palms of his hands across his eyes.

He was done mulling this over. He felt utmost ridiculous. If Diavolo had been able to leave so easily, why shouldn't Lucifer be allowed to leave the frustration he felt behind just as easily? Like the buzzing of a fly in an empty room, he would just swat away all those feelings he couldn't place. They would subside and he could finally act as if nothing had bothered him all along. He would be professional and do his job and now, with the curiosity of attraction removed, he could thrive and be nothing more than Diavolo's right hand man. Nothing more and nothing less.

He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stood up just to tumble to the ground again. A throbbing pain shot from his thighs all the way up to his hips and to the back of his neck, making Lucifer swear under his breath.

„That bastard,“ he grumbled.

What had he expected? It was no secret how well endowed Diavolo was and naturally, Lucifer had never been one to turn down a challenge, so they both had been quite eager, to say the least.

Using the bed to prop himself up, Lucifer eventually managed to get up again. He checked the clock. It was early in the morning hours, almost time for breakfast.

Painstakingly slow Lucifer moved over to his closet. For a moment, he mustered his reflection in the mirror and was met with a rare sight. His skin was speckled with temporary hickeys and love bites which would never be claimed in the end. The sight of it made Lucifer nauseous. He had never been a demon for one time deals.

He dressed himself quickly, making sure that every last shred of evidence of last night was covered and well hidden from the public eye.

As soon as he was done he made his way towards the dining hall, expecting to be the first and only one there.

Most of his brothers were either notorious over-sleepers or normally got held up by various other factors. On a normal day their order of arrival would be the following: reluctantly, Satan would arrive first. Then Asmodeus would waltz in, shining and in high spirits, followed by a sleep deprived Levi. After that, Mammon would trudge in, pulling a reluctant Yuuta with him. Lastly, Beel would arrive with Belphie in tow.

Today however, Lucifer entered the hall just to find Levi sitting at the table, eyes sunken in with his posture even worse than usual. He was aimlessly moving his scrambled eggs from one side of the plate to the other, staring off into the distance, looking rather miserable.

„Levi. It's rare to see you here this early,“ Lucifer said in greeting as he sat down next to his little brother.

There was a pot of freshly brewed coffee on the table and Lucifer poured himself a generous cup. Lost in thought, he cupped the mug- an ugly little thing Levi had brought from the human world- between his hands, taking slight comfort in the warmth it emitted.

Leviathan flinched, snapping out of his daze. His eyes widened as he noticed his brother sitting next to him. “Huh?” he mumbled. “When did you get here?”

Lucifer turned his head towards Levi in slight worry. “I have been here for several minutes.” Taking note of Levi's dark circles and tired eyes, Lucifer's eyebrows furrowed. “You look unwell,” he said clumsily. He could tell something was up with Levi, but Lucifer himself was hardly the best person to talk to about personal issues. Physical problems, he could solve in the blink of an eye. With mental issues however, he was completely lost. Hell, he himself had just created an unforgivable problem and frankly, he couldn't tell if he'd be able to solve this one with cold professionalism and distance.

Before Lucifer could come up with a suitable way of approach, Levi was zoning out again, so Lucifer did the only helpful thing he could think of. “Levi,” he said almost softly. His brother slowly looked up, his eyes far off and not quite there.

“Hm?”

“When was the last time you've slept?”

Levi simply shook his head, his eyebrows furrowed and a look of frustration on his face. He ran his hands over his face, letting them rest there for a moment. A deep sigh escaped his lips. “I don't know, maybe Wednesday?” He mulled it over for a few seconds. “Yeah, two hours on Wednesday.”

It was Saturday.

Lucifer put his hand on Levi's shoulder in a comforting manner. He was worried and could tell there was a lot on his brother's mind. Normally, his sleeping schedule was bad to begin with, but never to this kind of degree.

With his other hand, Lucifer dug his DDD out of his pocket and dialled a number he had memorized for emergencies. He took another look at Levi and squeezed his shoulder. “I'm calling your therapist.”

Levi opened his mouth to argue, but then simply reverted back to staring at the opposite wall. “Thank you,” he mumbled eventually.

Lucifer quickly explained his business to the therapist and then ended the call. She would come over as soon as possible.

“Go back to your room, Levi. I will send a servant to leave a meal in front of your door in case you get hungry. Make yourself comfortable and try to get some sleep in the meantime. Your therapist should be there in less than an hour. Alright?” he asked.

Levi stared at his brother for a moment before patting Lucifer's hand on his shoulder and then standing up. “Okay.”

Lucifer watched Leviathan closely as he left the dining room. As soon as he had left, Lucifer slumped down a bit. He didn't quite let go of his pristine posture, but definitely abandoned his almost obsessive need to look perfectly put together. He rubbed his eyes and let out a deep breath. Today was simply not the best of days. Not only was he now worried about his brother, he also had this unwavering feeling of disappointment in himself scraping at the back of his brain. With a big gulp of coffee Lucifer washed those feelings down his throat as he heard footsteps coming closer.

In favour of his own sanity, he simply focused on his coffee. There was no need for him to turn around and check in on who had just entered the dining room. If he was correct, they would identify themselves in less than a minute.

And correct he was.

Moments after they had entered, Mammon and Asmodeus started to bicker, followed by Yuuta trying to calm them down.

“Obviously I'll be the sexy one! Just look at me, I'm perfect, not to say perfect for the role!”

“Are ya tryin' to say I can't be sexy, ya asshole?! Yuuta come here, we'll show this bastard just how sexy I can be!”

“Wait, wait, wait-”

Lucifer held back the urge to throw something after his brothers. He simply turned around, annoyance apparent on his face. “Good morning, Mammon.”

Asmodeus interlocked his hands behind his back, softly swaying back and forth, the perfect picture of innocence. Mammon froze in place as he locked eyes with Lucifer. “G-good morning,” he stammered out as he avoided making eye contact with his big brother. Glad about the distraction, Yuuta plopped himself down onto a chair, keeping a safe distance of two chairs between himself and Lucifer.

“They've been at it the entire morning,” he groaned and poured himself an almost overflowing cup of coffee. He took an experimental sip, making sure he wouldn't burn his tongue. You could never know with food and beverages from the Devildom.

“And why, pray tell?”

In the background, Asmodeus and Mammon started to bicker again.

“Because they're fucking clowns.”

“Language, Yuuta.” Lucifer stopped for a moment. Surely but slowly, there was a certain kind of nausea filling his body. It was strange. It wasn't the normal sort of nausea that nestled in the deepest pit of your stomach. Instead, it seemed to slowly spread throughout Lucifer's entire body; buzzing and dangerous. As quickly as it had come, the sudden wave of nausea dissipated again. It took Lucifer a few seconds to collect himself again.

Yuuta stared at him with piercing red eyes. “Hey, old m- Lucifer. You there?”

“Of course. Why do you claim they are clowns?”

For a moment, Yuuta stared again, but then simply took a sip of coffee. “It's internet lingo, you wouldn't get it.”

“Listen here you insolent-”

“They got booked by Majolish!” Yuuta threw in quickly before Lucifer could start lecturing him. “It's a partner shoot and they want to go with a sexy cop and bad cop theme. Thing is, they couldn't decide on who should get which part so they left it up to them. And now they're fighting about who gets to be the sexy cop.” He shook his head as he turned around and watched the brothers fight for another moment. “How is this my life,” he added under his breath as he shook his head.

Lucifer turned his head towards his brothers as well and watched as Mammon threatened to cut up Asmodeus' lace shirts. He pushed his hair back and stood up. With quick steps he was at his brothers' side and pulled them apart.

“Enough, you two. You are setting a terrible example for Yuuta. If I catch you fighting one more time I will string you two up on the ceiling and leave you up there to your own devices. Do you understand?”

“But he-”

“Do you understand?!” Lucifer repeated himself with a sickly smile on his face. As his brothers both nodded, Lucifer suddenly felt movement behind his back. For some reason, that same strange feeling of nausea and just utmost wrongness filled him once again.

Fingers touched the back of his neck, only as much as ghosting over the bruised skin.

“Yuuta, what do you think you're doing?” Lucifer asked coldly.

Mammon and Asmo's heads whipped around to observe the scene as Yuuta quickly pulled his hand back.

“Sorry, it's just that...Did someone-”

With floating steps Asmodeus spun around Lucifer to Yuuta's side, peering curiously at whatever had caught Yuuta's attention. As he realized what he was looking at, he let out a loud gasp and subsequently exclaimed the same question Yuuta had just been about to ask.

“Did someone bite you?!”

Hurriedly, Lucifer covered the back of his neck with the palm of his hand.

That would explain the sting to his neck he had felt ever since waking up. Asmodeus stared at him for a split second, his shocked expression quickly turning into a gleeful one. “Oh my god! Oh my fucking god!” His head snapped around to Mammon. “Lucifer got laid!”

Mammon blinked at him in disbelief. “No way!” he exclaimed, genuinely surprised. He had never considered his brother to be all that interested in romance to begin with, so he couldn't quite believe what he was hearing. To him, Lucifer was more of a ruthless dictator incapable of love and compassion.

Nausea still swirled through Lucifer's body as he weighed his options. He had been too careless in the morning, lost in his momentary confusion and his rare emotional state. In a split second decision he grabbed Asmodeus by the collar. His head snapped back to Mammon first, then Yuuta. “This is not what you think it is. Not even in the slightest. If I find out you two have been gossiping there will be consequences. Dire consequences,” he threatened, eyes shooting daggers at them.

Reluctantly, Yuuta nodded, even though his eyes were telling an entirely different tale. Mammon moved over to him and gripped his arm.

With an unnecessary yank Lucifer pulled Asmodeus with him towards the door. His brother complained under his breath, but knowing Lucifer, he knew complying was generally better than having to suffer through the repercussions of disobeying.

As soon as they had left the dining room Lucifer let go of Asmodeus and motioned him to follow instead.

“Lucifer? Did I so something wrong?” Asmodeus asked, not able to tell what exactly he had done to make his brother act out like this. Usually, the only thing his teasing would earn him were a scoff and a rolling of the eyes. Today was different somehow.

Lucifer knew he wouldn't get out of this one without explaining what was going on. Asmodeus was way too smart when it was about reading other demons' emotions, especially when it was about love and affection.

Also, Lucifer felt sick to the bone. For a moment he stilled, his hand shooting to his mouth. He breathed deeply for a few seconds before his body calmed down a bit again.

“Lucifer?” Asmodeus asked again. “Are-”

“Follow me. To my room,” Lucifer simply stated as he realized that he had to give up this tiny part of his dignity. He hadn't quite decided yet on how much he would tell; hadn't quite decided on how much he _could_ tell without tainting the image of the almighty oldest brother.

The only thing he was certain of was that with last night, something had changed. Although Lucifer would highly appreciate keeping on living in complete denial and stone cold ignorance, realistically he knew something was unusual. Yes, something was certainly wrong.

With him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Sorry I'm so late with this update, but I've been.. how do you say... both depressed and in a big fat writer's block. I knew I would get writer's block sooner or later since i somehow managed to write my 30k DiaLuci fanfic that I wrote pior in like one month (maybe one and a half). Still, I got really frustrated because of that and was literally staring at the half finished page the whole time.  
> It's actually embarrassing but I got motivated again bc i watched the last episode of the haunting of bly manor and full on ugly cried bc of it and somehow that sparked my creativity. But yeah I'm back! Back to clowning Lucifer and making him suffer, I kind of see a pattern here.  
> Anyway, hope y'all are having a nice day and aren't doing too bad in these shitty times.  
> If you want to catch up with me on social media go to @leviathanswingman on tumblr or @simpingshrimp on twitter.  
> I always appreciate comments, criticism and kudos ^^


	3. The Compromise

As soon as the door to Lucifer's chambers closed behind them Asmo practically jumped his brother.

„Who is it?!“ he exclaimed excitedly as he tilted his head in anticipation like a curious puppy and clung to Lucifer's arm. „Oh- oh oh oh! Wait don't tell me, let me guess, please! This hasn't happened in decades!“

Lucifer plucked Asmo's clinging hands off his arm and leaned against his desk, crossing his arms as he kept his eyes on his giddy brother. He was still feeling slightly nauseous, but the short walk to his room had helped alleviate at least some of it.

There was a playful sparkle to Asmodeus' eyes, yet underlying, one could tell that he had an agenda. In an act of false thoughtfulness Asmodeus tapped his lush lips multiple times with his pointer. “Now who could it be? Who would be _sexy_ enough to make Lucifer, the poster demon of restraint, buckle? Hmmm, I wonder,” Asmo started, apparently having a death wish on his mind. With small steps, he tiptoed around the mahogany desk in a manner so gracefully he almost appeared to be floating.

“A one-night stand, maybe?”

Lucifer tried to suppress a shudder. Bulls eye. Still, his little brother didn't need to know that. So Lucifer simply readjusted his position, his body all sharp edges and steel. His jaw was locked tight as he observed the way Asmodeus flaunted through the room. All of a sudden Asmo stopped next to Lucifer, eyes big with shock.

“It can't be... Barbatos?!” he exclaimed in outrage. “I mean I understand the allure of some good butler and servant play, but don't tell me you fucked- ow ow OW!”

Finally done with Asmodeus' shenanigans, Lucifer had grabbed his brother roughly by the ear. “Stop joking around, Asmodeus. I did not, as you put it ever so crudely, fornicate with Barbatos. Now would you do me a favour and stay out of my private life? I am sure you have more important things to do.” He let go again and Asmodeus complained quietly as he rubbed his earlobe.

“But I wanna know, this never happens! It's not my fault I was born this gorgeous and curious, so come on!”

Lucifer stayed stoic. Hell would have to freeze over several times before he would admit to Asmodeus that he had slept with Diavolo only for their honoured demon prince to sneak out in the morning light as if the night had meant nothing to him. And this was the one thing Lucifer was ever so certain about- the night had meant _something_ , but only to him.

This was why he used to be so keen on keeping things professional between him and Diavolo. He knew that in the end, one of them would end up regretting it. In the end, he had at least been right about that fact.

“Practice some self-restraint,” Lucifer stated. His arms were once again crossed in front of his chest. As he thought back to the previous night, inexplicably his right hand, tucked safely between his side and the back of his upper arm, startled to tremble and almost violently, the feeling of nausea returned.

“Well, it looks like you haven't been doing that either, so why should I?” Asmodeus threw in, followed by an uncomfortable silence that filled the room.

He took Lucifer's lack of response as an unspoken invitation to keep on talking. “So my first guess was clearly wrong, but I don't think you would just go with your everyday bar bunny looking for a quick fling. That isn't your type. Your type would be...” Suddenly, Asmodeus' head snapped up. “Your type is-”

Without any hesitation Lucifer slapped his hand onto Asmo's mouth. He knew Asmodeus knew. Or at least, he was aware of Lucifer's preferences.

Still, Lucifer felt sick to his stomach. He had let his brother ramble on for far too long, but Lucifer had needed the time to calm his body down again. Nausea was running through his every core, green like envy and red like an angry sore.

He just knew he couldn't stand to hear it coming from someone else's mouth, put out into the world without his consent, yanking the reigns from Lucifer's hands.

If someone else were to vocalize that Lucifer loved Diavolo, not in the way a subject should love their lord, but in a way that was reserved for solely the closest of companions , it would make the whole ordeal undeniably real.

Lost in thought, Lucifer had completely forgotten that he was still clutching his little brother's mouth shut. He received a rude awakening as Asmodeus suddenly licked the palm of Lucifer's hand. Surprised, Lucifer let go of Asmo and shook his hand as his eyebrows drew together in disgust. “Asmodeus, this is revolting.”

“You started it!”

Lucifer felt his attention slipping again.

Although he hated to admit it, on their way from the dining hall to his own room he hadn't found an appropriate excuse to get Asmodeus off his tracks. When it was about love, infidelities, one night stands and generally most things lust-related, Asmodeus couldn't be fooled and Lucifer wasn't delusional enough to believe that he could out-smart the avatar of lust when the subjects of conversation were love and lust themselves. After all, Lucifer was sure it wouldn't take Asmodeus all too long to figure out what was going on here.

He had to be tactical with this one so he could keep the upper hand.

Right now, Asmodeus knew something he wasn't supposed to know to begin with, all due to Lucifer's own negligence. Ergo, Asmodeus had insider knowledge that could be good leverage for his own interests. This exactly was something Lucifer couldn't afford right now. The past few weeks, Asmo had been even more unhinged than usual. Lucifer had threatened him with house arrest and cleaning duty already, but neither had worked.

So he had gone and discussed the issue with Barbatos. Together, they had come to the conclusion that a few months away from the big city, just Asmodeus, two elderly demons and an old farm would do him some good.

Suddenly, the wheels started to turn in Lucifer's head.

He had found his solution. Admittedly, it wasn't optimal and Lucifer had to give up a little bit of his privacy and pride as an older brother, but if it were to work out like he knew it had to, he could manage to hit two birds with one stone.

For a moment Lucifer thought it over again. He rounded the mahogany desk, put his hands flat on its surface and leaned forward, staring at Asmodeus.

„Feel free to guess who I've had relations with, but keep in mind, your freedom right now is in my hands,“ Lucifer slowly said after a moment of strange silence. „You have been awfully active these last few weeks now, haven't you?“

Asmodeus threw himself sideways over one of the chairs and side-eyed his brother. He tilted his head back and sighed dramatically. „So we're going straight to business without any foreplay? How boring!“ After another short pause, Asmodeus mustered his brother. „You really don't want to tell me what happened?“ he asked with an uncharacteristically serious expression.

Lucifer leaned forward and ignored his brother's previous question. „I have a deal for you. We both know I won't let you run around as you please anymore. You are aware that I have been keeping a close eye on your behaviour and you have disappointed me severely. You have a reputation to uphold, yet you refuse to be responsible and instead spend your nights getting acquainted with every club in the city. Originally, Barbatos and I had decided on sending you away for a few months. The farms do need some helping hands this season, don't you think?”

Asmodeus' eyes widened almost unnoticeably, but he didn't interject. He needed his nights out, he needed them like a human needed oxygen. There was no way they would send him away, right?

Asmodeus grabbed Lucifer by his upper arms and looked at him with pleading eyes. “Please, not the ranch! I know my powers are good with animals, but the air over there will be downright toxic for my skin! Just thinking about it makes me break out, Lucifer please-”

Lucifer raised one finger, quieting his little brother in the process. “I have a proposal for you. If you don't want me to send you away, you will **listen** ,” Lucifer growled.

Staring up at his big brother's stony expression, Asmodeus simply nodded as he felt his heart race in his chest. Anxiety was coursing through his body and he was desperate, desperate enough to do anything Lucifer asked of him as long as he didn't have to give up that lavish lifestyle of his. As long as he wouldn't end up isolated somewhere in the wilderness, left to his own devices and even worse, left to his own thoughts.

“I am giving you one week on probation. If you manage to tone down your excessive partying and won't spread any information whatsoever about my supposed sex life, I will show mercy and humour you. I will humour you just once. If the week proves successful, I will grant you one question. You will be allowed to ask me one question which I will have to answer, no matter the subject of the matter. If you refuse to agree things will go as originally planned and a car will be waiting for you tomorrow morning at 8am sharp, ready to accompany you to the farm. Any questions?”

In the split of a second Asmodeus' worried thoughts screeched to a halt.

This was the exact moment he realized that this was so much more than him teasing Lucifer about a hookup. This was so much more than him trying to reason with his big brother so he wouldn't be sent away for his own outrageous behaviour. This was Lucifer doing damage control. If Asmodeus managed to survive this week, he would receive a get out of jail free card; he had a promise that he could ask Lucifer about what was bothering him so much to the point of blackmail, had a promise that he wouldn't be turned down for once.

Asmodeus had the choice between constant misery away from all he loved and cherished and a week of restraining himself to reach the truth. Just like that, he knew what he had to do.

“No questions,” he answered as he softened his grip on Lucifer's arms. “I agree to your terms.” His arms dropped to his sides as he took a deep breath before slathering on a big smile. “Tomorrow I'm going to a mixer, is that alright within our terms, dearest chaperone?” he questioned, his voice drowning with artificial honey and sweetness.

As he raised an eyebrow Lucifer slowly nodded his head. “It is good to see you cooperate, but I fear I will have to accompany you. If you do not feel comfortable with that I will have to send Barbatos to chaperone you.”

Asmo scoffed. “Yeah, no thank you. Barbatos can be a terrible killjoy when he's following orders.” All of a sudden, Asmodeus threw his hands around Lucifer's neck, hugging him tightly. “I'd rather choose my precious big brother after all!”

Lucifer stiffened and pushed his little brother off of him after a few seconds. Once again, he felt his stomach turn over multiple times. It took him all he had not to falter to his knees right then and there. “That's enough, Asmo,” he forced out. “We are done here, you can leave. Just remember our agreement.”

Before he stepped out, Asmodeus flashed his brother another one of his blinding smiles. “See you tomorrow, Lucifer! I'm looking forward to it!”

The door slammed shut and Lucifer dropped down to his knees, gripping at the fabric of his shirt. Even though everything had gone according to plan, he felt fickle and broken, his knees were trembling for no reason whatever as his gut filled with acid.

Ever since he had awoken in-between cold sheets, Lucifer felt as if his body had aged several millennia. Tired bones met tired eyes.

He gave himself no less than a minute before he forced himself up again. With one hand gripping onto the edge of his desk, Lucifer managed to push himself up again.

This was nothing. He was probably experiencing unnecessary psychosomatic pains from having been rejected by the one demon he respected the most, nothing more than that. It simply couldn't be more than that.

After all, he was Lucifer the Morning Star, a demon far too powerful to be moved by something as simple as _affection o_ r as difficult as _love._ Lucifer didn't care for nor lust after neither. He was above all of that. He _had_ to be above all of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! As you can see I'm finally somewhat over my writer's block! This chapter took me a bit to get ready bc i kept changing little details about luci and asmo's compromise, so i was a bit confused for a while. Once I figured it out though I finished pretty quickly.  
> One a sidenote I almost called this chapter "Asmo avoids getting sent to the ranch" but then I returned to my senses and was like yeah maybe I shouldn't do that.  
> Thank you for reading! If you want to visit me on social media you can finde me under @leviathanswingman on tumblr or @simpingshrimp on twitter (i'm way more active on tumblr tho no cap).  
> Comments, kudos and criticism are always appreciated, I hope y'all are having a nice day!


	4. Jealousy Is An Ugly Beast

“We can push you in on Wednesday at 10am, will that be alright?“

“Yes, that should work out, thank you.“

“Is there anything else I can-“

“Lucifer!“

Lucifer abruptly ended the call before Asmodeus, who had rudely thrown himself over his big brother, could have the chance to catch a glimpse at the caller ID on the display of his DDD. Although it was hardly a serious manner, Lucifer definitely didn't need his brothers all up in his business, causing a commotion because he had just scheduled an appointment with his doctor.

Everything would probably turn out to be fine anyway. Physically, Lucifer didn't feel much different than usual. He was strong and healthy, if it weren't for those strange spells of nausea and queasiness he'd been experiencing ever since Saturday morning.

Normally, he wasn't one to immediately run to the doctors at the tiniest of ouches, but this time, he knew something wasn't right.

His symptoms weren't merely physical. It was as if this horrible nausea was deeply anchored within his bones. Every time it flared up Lucifer's skin bristled with an inexplicable longing, ached for something that was just out of reach but also not quite unreachable yet.

The fact that Lucifer himself had neither knowledge nor control over this bothersome sickness of his drove him up the wall. He was not used to being clueless and he had unanimously decided that cluelessness was a feeling he did not agree with. So he had simply decided, if he didn't know what was going on, then why waste his time unnecessarily worrying about it if there were licensed professionals to clear his mind?

Asmodeus was still draped over Lucifer's body, standing on his tiptoes with his chin resting on Lucifer's shoulder. Admittedly, Asmodeus was surprised to see that Lucifer hadn't shrugged him off already. As usual, Asmo was presently aware of the fact that most of his brothers didn't so much as appreciate his little shows of affection. Generally, affection was pretty much lacking in their family. For Asmo however, being touchy-feely was his sole way of conveying emotions. Due to his own nature he was easily misunderstood and because of that fact, he had learned to rely on his body instead. It was easier that way anyway.

After a moment Lucifer stiffened and pushed Asmodeus off.

As he removed himself from his older brother out of the corner of his eye he saw Lucifer sliding his DDD back in his back pocket. There was nothing particular about it, yet Asmo found himself suddenly filled with unease.

“Are you ready? It's been so long since we last went out together! If I remember correctly we last went out back in the celestial-”

Lucifer sighed deeply as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Do not forget that I am here to keep an eye on you, Asmodeus. Do not mistake my kindness for foolishness. If I see you acting out of line I will not hesitate to drag you back to your room and let you rot in there.”

Asmodeus flashed his brother one of his trademark smiles. “Noted! Can we go now? I don't want to keep everyone waiting.”

With another sigh Lucifer pulled his coat a little closer to his body. “Of course, lead the way.”

They walked for around 20 minutes before they arrived in front of one of the clubs Asmodeus was a regular at. The air was crispy clean and it took Lucifer all he had not to shiver. He hated that he had to be here, but in the end, there wasn't much he could do about that now. After all, this was his very own way of doing damage control. If all it took to keep Asmodeus from blabbering to his brothers was a night out then Lucifer would make damn sure the night would pass without any issues.

Asmo strutted towards the bouncer with a grin on his face. The bouncer, who was apparently already acquainted with Asmodeus, greeted him with quick kisses to each cheek. They exchanged pleasantries for a while and Lucifer found himself mustering the mingling club goers with much disdain. Instead of having a nice evening in the music room, surrounded by some relaxing classic music with a good cup of tea where he could regret Friday's mistakes in peace, this was how he had to spend his Monday evening.

“Lucifer, come on!” Asmodeus exclaimed, finally done with his chit-chat with the bouncer. He waved his big brother towards him, a club stamp already drying on the back of his hand.

In this moment, Lucifer decided he really despised all of this.

With an exasperated sigh he pulled off his gloves and walked towards the bouncer, who gave him an intimidated smile before grabbing his hand and pressing a wet stamp on the back of it. The bouncer held onto Lucifer's hand for a second too long and Lucifer quickly retracted his hand as he felt that familiar sense of nausea crawl up his spine again.

“Oh, sorry Lord Lucifer, Sir! It's just that-” the bouncer stammered as Lucifer raised an eyebrow at him. “You have very pretty hands.”

Lucifer could hear Asmo snickering in the back as he subconsciously rubbed his hand and took a step back. H nodded courtly before following his little brother into the club, slightly taken aback. What was that about?

They made their way through the crowd of demons who were lingering at the bar and on the dance floor, happily swaying to whatever ear-demolishing electronic music was playing at the moment. As he followed Asmodeus Lucifer rubbed his temples. At the end of the evening he would be rewarded with a splitting headache, he was quite certain of that.

As they reached their table they were greeted by a flock of demons Lucifer had never met before. Asmodeus went around the table once, exchanging pleasantries with every single one of them. Lucifer simply sat down after having acknowledged the round with a welcoming, yet simultaneously distant greeting.

The waiter came around and took their orders. Lucifer ordered nothing but a tall glass of water. After all he was here to keep an eye on Asmodeus' behaviour and make sure that things didn't escalate as they had way too often these past weeks.

Hours passed and except for Lucifer having to deny the advances of a particularly eager demon who attended the mixer, nothing out of the ordinary had happened. He leaned back in his seat and managed to relax a bit.

All evening, he had felt this never stopping nausea tingle along his every cell and despite his best efforts to ignore it, he remained all to aware of the sensation.

From minute to minute he found himself increasingly more annoyed with the demons Asmodeus chose to hang out with. They were pushy, shameless and didn't seem to care all that much about the fact that Lucifer didn't feel the need to participate in their incessant flirtations. How Asmodeus managed to deal with them so easily, Lucifer couldn't tell.

A while ago, Asmodeus had left the table with two somewhat intoxicated demons, ready to let loose on the dance floor. Lucifer kept a stern eye on them, but remained stagnant in his seat. He had told Asmodeus that he didn't feel the need to dance, which was nothing more than a lie yet also nothing less than a truth.

To be quite honest, he had remained at the deserted table mostly to make sure no one would have their way with the drinks. Of course, demons had more loose morals than humans did, but that didn't mean demons with highly questionable intentions were non extinct among their kind.

Lucifer took out his DDD to work on an assignment he had transferred to his phone before he had left.

Just as he was about to start, Asmo returned, slightly sweaty and out of breath. “Am I doing good, Lucifer?” he asked as he scanned the table for his drink, only to find it empty. “Guess I might as well order another one,” he huffed as he turned around, looking to see if there was a waiter nearby.

Lucifer put his phone back on standby and gave his little brother a once over. “I hardly think you-” he started, but was interrupted by the crowd suddenly going wild.

Asmo looked around, hoping to figure out what had caused the sudden commotion. In the end, he didn't have to search for all too long.

Lord Diavolo, Solomon, Simeon and Barbatos were just entering the club, all three of them with club stamps shining bright red on the back of their hands.

For a moment, Lucifer stared at the entrance without moving. He hated to be caught off guard and this was so much more than he had ever expected from this night, in the negative sense.

Meeting eye to eye for the first time after Diavolo had ditched Lucifer after an apparent one night stand was most definitely not on top of Lucifer's list of most favourable outcomings for a Monday night. Although he knew he would be alright in the long run, after all he took pride in being professional at all times, he would have preferred to be able to actually prepare for this meeting.

A waiter passed by the table and Asmodeus quickly waved them over. If one didn't know Asmodeus you would almost think he was panicking in the way his hands started to shake as he caught a glance of the commotion-causing guests.

Perhaps he was simply overly desperate for another drink.

“Another gin and tonic, please?” he forced out as he tucked his hair behind his ear with shaking fingers.

Lucifer looked at Diavolo one more time and without wanting to, ever so rudely and unasked for, he remembered firm muscles and even more than that; soft fingers tracing the delicate scars beneath his shoulder blades. Plump lips grazing along the nape of his neck. That deep, honeyed voice sinking through his ear canal right into his brain, implanting itself in there, like a parasite you had subconsciously invited in yourself.

The feeling of nausea doubled in the span of a second and all of a sudden, Lucifer's field of vision went blank. He gripped the edge of the table harshly, his nails digging into the cheap tablecloth, leaving behind ugly rips in red, slightly sticky plastic. After a few moments his sight cleared up again and his eyes focused on the waiter who was still waiting diligently in front of the table.

“Make that two. Go heavy on the demonus.”

“O- of course, sir. I will be right back!” As the waiter power walked back to the bar Lucifer allowed himself a second to breathe.

“Of all nights they chose to abandon their duties, why did it have to be this one,” he grumbled to himself as he sat down again, an unsettling feeling manifesting in his chest.

“Who are you telling that,” Asmo sighed as he dropped down onto the chair next to Lucifer. “Aphrodite has it out for me, I'm telling you.”

They both just sat there for a moment, united in both of their troubles, each lost in their own grief until the waiter gently placed two tall glasses of gin and tonic in front of them.

“Anything else?”

“No, I think we're good.”

That simple statement almost made Lucifer scoff. He was not even close to good. Just about now he was regretting every single decision in his life that had lead him to this point. If he hadn't given in to temptation he wouldn't be in this mess of a situation right now. If he hadn't given in, everything would still be proper and right and he didn't have to dread seeing Diavolo's annoyingly handsome face in public.

Lucifer grabbed his drink without hesitation and was joined by Asmodeus almost immediately.

“Cheers,” his little brother said with his voice uncharacteristically bleak and bland.

“Cheers,” Lucifer retorted in the same manner. The clink of their glasses filled the room as they were approached by that certain group of people they had both dreaded to see so much.

“Oh, Lucifer! It's rare to see you out of your office,” Simeon greeted. “In a club nonetheless.”

“I am solely here to keep an eye on Asmodeus,” he swiftly answered.

To an outsider, there wouldn't be anything particularly strange about the way their interaction went. Both parties were behaving in the most civil of manners, almost routinely so.

Although nothing appeared to be out of the ordinary, in his mind, Lucifer found himself running through possibility after possibility after every single interaction. He had already decided that he would simply pretend that Friday night had never happened. Still, it was much more difficult than that, since there was a stark difference between forgetting and acting as if he had forgotten. Every single one of his words was thought over precisely and calculated properly.

Still, there was a conflict inside of him that was still at war, looking for a way out.

Ignoring Diavolo was not a solution. After all, this was Diavolo he was talking about. Diavolo, the demon prince himself. Diavolo, the man who had lent his hand to Lucifer when he was at his lowest point in life. The man Lucifer had subsequently dedicated his life to.

However, there was that certain part of Lucifer that just couldn't let got. Even though he didn't have the right to feel as if he had been hurt, his heart told him otherwise. And this, Lucifer refrained to deal with because he knew, he did not have the right to feel as if he had been wronged. Neither him nor Diavolo had ever so much as hinted at the possibility of them being more than simple friends or partners. Accepting the right to feel wronged would be an act of utmost arrogance and entitlement, an act Lucifer could not pull off in all honesty. His arrogance had put him in this situation in the first place.

Lucifer took a big gulp of his gin and tonic as he watched Barbatos, Diavolo and Simeon join them at the currently vacant table. He felt the demonus run down his throat, spreading a comfortable heat in his stomach.

“It's been a while since we've all been out together, albeit today was unplanned,” Simeon started as he flicked through the menu with much interest. “So let's enjoy ourselves for once, hmh?”

“Certainly,” Barbatos agreed before he shifted his attention to Lucifer. “There is one question I would like to ask Lucifer though, if that is quite alright.”

Diavolo nodded his head as he grabbed a menu as well and started to scan the pages. “There's no need to ask for permission, just go ahead.” The demon prince kept his head buried in the menu and avoided any eye contact with his right hand man. Despite everything, Lucifer was not surprised. He had almost expected Diavolo to behave in such a manner.

“Splendid. I found myself quite taken aback by your sudden request to cancel Asmodeus' trip to the farms. The last time we conversed you seemed quite eager to send him there. What prompted you to change your mind, if I may ask?”

Lucifer looked at Barbatos, his eye twitching in annoyance. There was no fooling him. Logically speaking, there was no reason whatsoever for Barbatos to be _asking_ for information. Due to his nature, Barbatos was quite literally all-knowing. If he asked for certain pieces of information that meant most certainly that there were ulterior motives involved.

“We have found an agreeable compromise, that is all. Take it as a sort of probation,” Lucifer answered just as Asmodeus chimed in, empty glass in hand.

“If I manage to behave I'll get rewarded, can you believe that?!”

Solomon shot Asmodeus a strange look that Lucifer certainly didn't miss as the waiter returned once again, ready for their orders.

Perhaps there was a bit more to Asmodeus' acting out than he had first expected. Lucifer stared at Solomon for several seconds for good measure, making sure that the sorcerer was aware of the fact that he had been caught red handed

Solomon returned his gaze without any hesitation.

For a moment an almost awkward silence filled the table before Diavolo started to blabber on about this and that, successfully clearing the awkward aura.

As the others lost themselves in the comfort of idle chitchat Solomon watched Lucifer for another moment before slowly nodding his head towards a far-away corner of the club. Lucifer took note of the action and nodded shortly. He didn't know why Solomon would feel the need to speak to him in private, but if this was what it took to get Lucifer away from that damn table he would certainly not miss that opportunity, even if that meant being forced to have a one on one with the shady sorcerer that your little brother was most certainly in love with.

Although Lucifer hadn't had more than half of his drink he felt nauseous with every additional second of Diavolo acting as if nothing had happened and failing ever so disgracefully with that one simple task of his. Whenever Lucifer so much as turned his head away from the demon prince he could feel those honey coloured eyes mustering him up and down, as if they were searching for an answer to a question they themselves didn't quite know.

Lucifer excused himself and left the table, heading towards the direction Solomon had hinted at. After a few minutes of waiting Solomon joined him. They stared at each other for several moments before Solomon spoke up.

“Sorry for the intrusion, but I felt inclined to speak up.”

“Speak up about what, Solomon? I do not have time for any of your games, so just spit it out while you are at it. I am really not in the mood tonight,” Lucifer answered.

“Your aura. It has changed.” There was a strange shimmer to Solomon's eyes. “But you're already aware of that, aren't you?” He crossed his arms in font of his chest and observed Lucifer, looking for a reaction.

“I do not know what you are taking about.” Despite his words Lucifer cursed inwardly. There was only one thing Solomon could possibly be alluding to. And of course, Lucifer had noticed the change. Hell, he had even scheduled a doctor's appointment because of it. Solomon was talking about that nauseating feeling which seemed to follow Lucifer no matter where he went. What else could he be talking about. There was no way those symptoms had conveniently appeared Saturday morning right after Diavolo had left him. They were too specific and too well timed to be nothing more than your common symptoms of sickness, Lucifer was painfully aware of that. Still, a part of his mind had tried to deny the facts until Solomon had decided to open his mouth. With -although an unasked for- second opinion there was no way for Lucifer to deny them anymore. Those were the consequences he now had to face, whether he wanted to or not.

“I did not tell you this to confront you, I just thought it was something you should be aware of. After all-”

“I appreciate the concern,” Lucifer threw in, interrupting Solomon in the process, “but your _help_ is not needed here. Everything is under control. Now would you mind going back to the others before Asmodeus starts to worry?”

Solomon turned around to make his way back to their table, but was stopped by Lucifer catching his wrist in a strong hold.

“I do not appreciate seeing my brothers get hurt, so show some decency and treat him well,” Lucifer threatened, his voice a low grumble against Solomon's ear.

Solomon did not move. He did not have to ask who Lucifer was talking about. Of course he had noticed Asmodeus' erratic behaviour these past weeks but in all honesty, Solomon didn't see how he was involved in that affair. But still, he worried and to some extent, he could tell Lucifer was also acting out of a place of worry. So Solomon stood his ground and locked eyes with Lucifer.

“Although I think you are barking up the wrong tree here, I can assure you of one thing.” He shook Lucifer's hand off. “I would _never_ hurt him.”

They stared at each other for another moment before they both pulled back and made their way back to their table, the air around them tense and quite uncomfortable.

“Where have you been?” Asmo whined as he saw the two of them finally return to the table.

“There was something we had to talk about, but it's all settled now,” Solomon answered as he slid into the seat next to Asmo, who seemed to be fairly drunk and threw his arms around Solomon sloppily as soon as the man had sat down.

Lucifer was once again nursing his drink as he lost himself in a senseless yet still enjoyable conversation with Simeon and Barbatos. Strangely and suddenly, he felt an uncomfortable sensation starting to settle in the pit of his stomach. It was an unexpected, ugly thing, tearing and pulling at his innards for no apparent reason whatsoever. Lucifer halted in his conversation and as his head shot up in surprise, his eyes unintentionally focused on Diavolo, who was lounging at the bar, lost in a conversation with one of the bartenders.

From afar, Lucifer could see that loopy, careless smile on Diavolo's face that he -even though he would be caught dead admitting it out loud- had grown somewhat fond of, as the demon prince chatted with the bartender. As Lucifer watched them, he saw the bartender reach out until his hand lingered on Diavolo's neck for far too long, in a manner that could solely be described as flirtatious.

All of a sudden, Lucifer felt like his entire body was sinking far down into the ground, rotting with every second he forced himself to watch the couple. He had no right to feel this way, yet he still couldn't rip his eyes off the sight of Diavolo ever so comfortable and ever so happy, lost in thought with that handsome bartender of his.

Jealously was an ugly beast. Right then and there, Lucifer couldn't hold his thoughts at bay, couldn't control them and file them away in neat little drawers, put them in categories of professional, acceptable and unacceptable. For once, his composure slipped and as it did, his head started to spin dangerously.

“I will be right back,” he excused himself quickly as he made a straight line towards the bathroom.

He tumbled into one of the stalls and quickly locked the door behind him, not caring about whether he had been seen by anyone or not. If anything people would just assume he'd had a bit too much demonus after all.

Lucifer was forced to his knees as his head buzzed with impeding darkness and his legs shook violently. He felt sick to his bones.

It was one foolish night where Lucifer had let his emotions slip and had allowed himself to indulge in what he'd been craving for, nothing more than that.

Even though he hated to admit to his mistakes, Lucifer could now safely say that in the span of one night, his life had turned into a big fucking mess.

 _The fortunes must really despise me_ , he mused as he found himself sprawled over a toilet seat, nauseous to the core.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I don't even know what to say, this chapter was supposed to be shorter but then i got some rando new ideas i just couldn't let go of and it escalated a bit again. Anyway! I'm not too sure if I am proud of this chapter or not, but I wrote it and that's what counts! Also I would say I'm sorry for throwing in some implied solodeus drama but I'm really not. Also I love making Solomon and Lucifer interact bc I am 100% certain Solomon fears nothing and no one.  
> Hope you enjoyed the new chapter, I always appreciate comments, kudos and criticism! If you want to find me on social media go to @leviathanswingman on tumblr or @simpingshrimp on twitter. Have a good day or night y'all (it's almost 6am over here and i have slept two hours in the past 48 hours i think byeee)


	5. At The Doctor's Office

Lucifer was sitting on an uncomfortable plastic chair in the waiting room of the doctor's office, clad in what could only be described as a mediocre attempt at a disguise. He had swapped his pristine waistcoat and dress shirt combination out for an oversized black hoodie he had borrowed from Beelzebub without asking beforehand. His face was partially covered with a face mask, more so to hide his identity than prevent his fellow demons from catching whatever seemed to be ailing him.

After all, Lucifer was a well known face in the devildom. Landing on the front page of some overrated gossip magazine was the last thing he needed at the moment, especially since he had conveniently failed to mention his visit to the doctor's office to anyone who knew him. It would be quite bothersome if they found out from a not so well meaning third party, so the safest option was for him to remain in disguise

Lucifer pulled the heavy hood a bit further down to his face as he took note of the other people in the waiting room. Of course, Lucifer had chosen the perfect time to have a scheduled doctor's appointment. The room was packed to the brim with sniffling demons of all ages. There was a little D running around, apparently trying to win the award for most annoying toddler to walk hell.

Lucifer massaged the bridge of his nose and let out a deep breath of air. The stuffed waiting room felt suffocating and the overlapping scents of different strong perfumes, stale coffee and disinfectant did nothing for the headache that had been pestering Lucifer ever since he'd returned home from the club with a drunk Asmodeus in tow.

Lucifer started to shake his left leg up and down in what could be misinterpreted as a nervous tic, but was actually nothing more than proof of his current impatience.

The demon sitting next to him tried multiple times to engage him in polite but nonsensical small talk as Lucifer scrolled through his DDD, trying to look as bored and unapproachable as possible. He was annoyed to see that his tactic did not work out whatsoever. The demon next to him was apparently hell-bent on making a new friend at the doctor's office.

Lucifer crossed his arms in front of his chest and suppressed an annoyed groan. The close proximity to this other demon did nothing to soothe his terrible nausea. However, since the waiting room was packed already Lucifer had no choice but to remain in his seat and put up with it.

Although in the beginning Lucifer did find a certain kind of interest in seeing the way people interacted with him, thinking he was regular demon, he had quickly found himself bothered by the lack of respect even faster.

He just wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible and then be left alone. The universe however seemed to have different plans for him.

Just as the ever so adamant demon pulled out their very own DDD to show Lucifer a picture of some brat he had taken in,the doctor's assistant peeked her head through the door, her pretty curls bouncing with the slightest of movements, and nodded towards Lucifer.

To his luck, she had apparently remembered Lucifer's request to not be called by name to keep his identity a secret from the public eye. After all, Lucifer was not the most common of names in the devildom.

Lucifer removed himself from the waiting room as quickly as possible before the demon that had been bothering him for the past half an hour could say one word more, or even worse, ask for his number. Without looking back even once Lucifer followed the secretary who was already leading him towards the doctor's examination room.

„Terribly sorry for the long wait, but as you can see we're swamped right now. The practice down the street got closed because the doctor's wife found out her husband was cheating on her, so she ripped off his right hand. An eye for an eye, you know? A real tragedy though,“ she chattered on as Lucifer stepped into the empty examination room. „Not for him, but for the wife of course.“

„Most certainly,“ Lucifer answered stiffly, a bit taken aback by the situation, hoping the conversation was over now. He wasn't sure what sort of answer the assistant expected from him after this conversational bomb she had dropped ever so casually.

She hovered in the doorway for another moment. „The doctor should be with you in a second, honey.“ She closed the door behind herself as she left in a pace far too comfortable considering the state of the practice.

Lucifer stared at the door for a moment, perplexed. To have another demon address him so casually _despite_ knowing damn well who he was. That woman certainly feared nothing and no one.

Although normally Lucifer would feel offended, right now he found himself somewhat amused by this woman's strangely laid-back behaviour.

He slipped back his hood, pulled down the face mask and sat down on the chair opposite the doctor's desk.

Now finally by himself again, he took notice of how the nausea gradually subsided again until it had simmered down to nothing more than a dark, buzzing premonition in the back of his mind.

A few minutes later the door opened with a soft clack and Lucifer made sure not to turn around until he heard it close again.

The doctor, a tall demon with impressive horns and an almost weirdly symmetrical face, approached him with confident steps and shook his hand quickly after he had stood up. It was a good, strong handshake and Lucifer couldn't help but nod in approval.

„Welcome, Lucifer,“ she greeted before walking around the table and dropping down onto the chair, motioning towards Lucifer to do the same. „So what brings you here? I see your brothers come here all the time, yet I don't think I've treated you more than three times ever since I started working here. Are you maybe a bit of an iatrophobe?“

Lucifer pushed his hair back before starting to speak. For some reason, today he found himself surrounded by infuriatingly talkative people. „I do not have Iatrophobia. I refuse to go to the doctor for something as simple as a cold. If I can cure it myself I will do so, which is why you see me less often than my brothers. I do not see any problems with that.“

The doctor simply watched Lucifer as he answered her question. „Interesting,“ she nodded. „So what can I help you with?“

Lucifer took a deep breath. Technically, he still had time to leave the doctor's office to deal with whatever this was by himself. He was Lucifer the Morning Star, he did not need anyone. Yet despite these strong feelings of aversion that were boiling inside of him, Lucifer knew that he needed to do the correct thing right now. Lashing out out of a misplaced feeling of overwhelming arrogance was not the kind of behaviour that Lucifer could display proudly. So rather reluctantly, he forced himself to relax his shoulders and lean back. After all, knowing what exactly was wrong with him was already a step towards improvement.

„Since Saturday morning I have been experiencing strange bursts of nausea. They seem to differ in intensity depending on the situation, but in the worst case I have had until now I ended up having to rest on the floor for a quarter-hour. I assume you understand that I cannot afford to have side effects like these. They are disruptive and unpleasant and keep me from doing my job to my best abilities.”

The doctor nodded as she propped her chin up with one hand. „Any other symptoms?“

„Aside from headaches and migraines, no, but I have been getting these for ages so I am quite certain that they are in no way related to the nausea.“

„Alright. I will take your blood and run it through the system, so we should know more in a second.“

At the doctor's request Lucifer moved over to the surgery couch and rolled up the sleeve of his hoodie. He watched her closely as she disinfected her hands, put on gloves and gathered the appliances she needed to draw his blood. Lucifer stared at the needle as it was routinely pushed into the sensitive skin at the crook of his elbow, followed by dark red blood quickly filling up the vial of an empty syringe. When she was done the doctor pressed soft cotton against the little red puncture wound and suddenly yelled out loud.

„Sweetheart!“

Lucifer refrained from rubbing his temples. „Next time I would prefer a warning, alright?“ he said rather pointedly.

The door opened and as Lucifer's head snapped around to see who had entered, he recognized the assistant from before. „Yes, Miss Doctor?“

The doctor simply extended her arm and shook the vial of blood. The doctor's assistant seemed to understand her without any words and simply grabbed the vial before leaving the room again. „Got it!“

Lucifer turned back around to his doctor and noticed a small smile sneaking up on her face.

„My wife,“ she explained before turning back around to her patient. „Let's get your physical over with while Preta gets the results of your blood work. Please remove your clothes.“

Lucifer did as he was asked to. As the doctor whose name tag read 'Naamah' in bold, black letters, carefully examined his body the room was filled with silence. Naamah turned to Lucifer's backside and suddenly halted for a short moment before finishing the exam. „You can put your clothes back on.“

Lucifer pulled his hoodie back over his head as the door opened once again and the doctor's assistant, Preta, hurried over to her wife, handing her several sheets of paper.

„Thank you, darling.“

“You're welcome!”

She left again and Lucifer watched the doctor closely as she flipped through page after page. While she scanned through the last sheet of paper however, her eyebrows furrowed bit by bit.

„So?“ Lucifer asked almost impatiently.

Naamah put down the papers and sat down on her chair again, then picked up the last sheet of paper one more time to reread it. „Alright. I think I see the problem here,“ she finally said. „I have one more question for you, just so we can rule out anything else.“

Lucifer crossed his arms in front of his chest. The faster he got all of this over with the better.

„Have you had any significant romantic or sexual relations in the past week?“

The world seemed to stop for several seconds as Lucifer stared at the woman in front of him. He had expected any sort of uncomfortable question, but this...

„I hardly see how this could be of importance to you,“ he answered harshly. There was no reason for a medical professional to ask him this specific question. Or rather, there simply shouldn't be a reason for his doctor to ask him a question ever so private in nature, not when his sole symptom was debilitating nausea.

„Answer the question, please.“

He had already stepped over his own shadow and dragged himself to the doctor with his problems, so Lucifer accepted defeat and rubbed his temple with two fingers as he answered. „Yes, I have had sexual relations in the past week. You are inquiring about this because?“

Naamah folded her hands together and leaned slightly forward. „Multiple partners or a singular partner?“

„One person. Only one person.“

The doctor nodded her head as if Lucifer had just confirmed her suspicions. She lifted her head and looked at Lucifer directly. „I'm just going to give it to you straight. It's very rare to happen, but it seems that you have formed a bond without you nor your partner knowing.“

Lucifer simply stared at her for several moments. „What are you talking about?“

„It seems like the reason for your side effects is that you have become mates with your partner, but neither of you have been aware of it. Your body is showing withdrawal symptoms. Headaches, dizziness, nausea, poor concentration, heightened irritability. As I said, this doesn't happen often, but it's definitely not unheard of.“

The world stopped turning right then and there. This was what Lucifer had feared the most. Not only were his symptoms serious and acknowledged, they were undeniably tied to Diavolo. Although a part of him refused to even consider the possibility of what the doctor had just told him, an even bigger part inside of him knew she had to be right.

He didn't want her to be right. This was the kind of truth that he happily refused to believe in because there was no way for him to accept it just like that.

„You must be wrong.“

Naamah shook her head and pointed at Lucifer himself. „I understand that you can't believe me that easily, so please go over to the mirror and take off your shirt so you can see for yourself.“

Lucifer walked over to the mirror with almost robotic movements and took of his hoodie once again.

„Turn around and look at your neck please.“

Lucifer did as he was told and upon raking his neck, he saw a truth he simply could not deny. Right there, on the nape of his neck, where days before had been a dark purple hickey, was now a pale, yet definitely noticeable sigil forming with delicate dark red strokes.

Shocked, Lucifer slowly reached up and let shaking fingers run over the fresh sigil. He felt neither bumps nor edges, but instead noticed how his skin tickled in an almost coy fashion upon contact. This could not be his life. There was no way. Perhaps all of this was nothing more than an intricate lucid nightmare, it had to be.

„Lucifer?“

His head snapped back to Naamah. For once, he found himself at a loss for words. How would he ever be able to explain this situation? Lucifer stared at his reflection and noted dark circles and tired eyes.

„Does he need to know?“

The doctor sighed as she returned to her chair. „Technically, no. I would strongly advise you to tell him though. The fact that you have developed withdrawal symptoms already tells me that were the one to accept the mark first. Your partner might not experience symptoms at all, but the sigil will appear on his skin as well.“

Without wanting to, his hand shot back up to the nape of his neck. There was no way he could just accept all of that.

„You must be mistaken. I can tell you, there is no way i could have formed a bond in the span of one single night,“ Lucifer forced out and the doctor sighed. “It is impossible.”

„I know this is hard to accept, but this does happen from time to time. Your symptoms will only become less intense if you go and clear things up with your partner. Until then I can prescribe you suppressants which will help with the nausea and the headaches, but keep in mind that they are not an eternal solution. You can safely take them for a month if you stretch it out, but not longer than that, do you understand me?“

Staring straight ahead for several seconds, Lucifer found his mind adrift, far away from the clean doctor's office his physical form was sitting in at the moment. The universe really seemed to have it out for him.

How could he have been so foolish to just abandon his beliefs in the heat of the moment in exchange for what? A romantic night with Diavolo, _Lord_ Diavolo, his superior and friend of decades upon decades?

This was the universe's way of punishing him for daring to be arrogant enough to assume that his actions wouldn't have consequences. If anything, he should know better than any other demon walking in hell that every single one of your actions had consequences.

With all of the many mistakes he had ever made, this one might have been the most stupid one. Because usually, Lucifer knew better.

He had refused to look at Diavolo as anything more than his lord and his superior for so long exactly because he knew better. He knew for a fact that some things were too good to be true. Those kind of things were generally followed by great misfortune. And now, Lucifer had to deal with the repercussions, had to deal with the punishment for allowing himself to follow his emotions instead of relying on cold, brash logistics.

„Lucifer?“

He snapped out of his train of thought and hurriedly put his hoodie back on. „Of course. What were you saying about suppressants before?“

Naamah narrowed her eyes, but did her job without mentioning anything else that could possibly push Lucifer's boundaries. After all, she was a doctor and her job was to make sure her patients were correctly informed and cared for. She simply had to trust that they would follow her words.

Twenty minutes later, Lucifer left the office, a freshly printed prescription sheet weighing heavily in the back pocket of his trousers.

On his way back to the house of lamentation he picked up the suppressants and stared at them for a good minute. He hated the sight of them, hated what they were implying. The back of his neck tickled tauntingly as he threw the orange pill bottle back into the white plastic bag, applying much more force than needed before he continued his way back home. He could've taken the bus back to the house of lamentation, but somehow, Lucifer felt restless and unhinged. So instead of a 10 minute ride he took on 45 minutes of walking instead, hoping that it would give him enough time to calm down, keep his face and portray the meticulous big brother again as if nothing of significance had happened.

It turned out that in the end, taking a 45 minute walk hadn't helped much with the disarranged state of his mind. Lucifer entered the house of lamentation and let the doors slam shut behind him. On the way up to his room he passed no one but Mammon, who simply stared at him in a confused manner for several moments,but didn't utter any words to his big brother, which admittedly, was a good thing.

Lucifer wasn't all too sure how he would have reacted if Mammon had dared to approach him.

The doors to his room slammed shut behind him and Lucifer threw the white plastic bag onto his bed before going after it and pulling out the orange pill bottle. He popped it open and shook out one singular little pill, turning it around between his thumb and pointer before swallowing it dry.

Lucifer let himself drop down onto his bed, not even bothering to switch Beel's sweater out with his usual waistcoat and dress shirt combination.

He simply laid there and stared at the ceiling. He knew he should be coming up with a plan by now, thinking about all possible outcomes and most agreeable endings, but after having found out that he had formed a mating bond with Diavolo, in the middle of a one night stand of all things, Lucifer had to take a moment to breathe. He had to take a breather to simply come to terms with all of it.

Just as he was about to get up again the ringing of his DDD filled the silence. Lucifer retrieved it from the hoodie's kangaroo pocket and stared at the screen in aggravated defeat.

It was Lord Diavolo.

He gathered himself and fixed his hair before accepting the call, letting his professional persona take over.

He was Lucifer the Morning Star and he would be damned if he let something as simple as a misplaced mating bond destroy the life he had built up ever so diligently. Without any hesitation Lucifer picked up the call as he took note of the way his body filled with nausea in the span of mere seconds.

„Diavolo. What can I assist you with?“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I am back! Yes I am aware that I literally updated like a day ago but somehow the muses struck me with inspiration so yes. I had to laugh so much last chapter bc I got several comments thinking that Lucifer might be pregnant. Although male pregnancy is very much possible, in this fanfic Lucifer does not have the facilities for that, I'm sorry if you expected anything of these sorts.   
> Anyway, i included the lesbian doctor and doctor's assistant because why not. Also known as I'm gay and there's no women in obey me and I'm a bit sad bc of that.  
> Thank you for reading, come and visit me under @leviathanswingman on tumblr or @simpingshrimp on twitter.


	6. Overruled Pride

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a PSA!! I have seen many commenters assume that Lucifer is pregnant and I am now here to officially say: he is neither  
> \- pregnant  
> \- knocked up  
> -having a bun in the oven  
> nor enceinte!!  
> although i don't have anything against mpreg this one is not mpreg!  
> cheers my lads

Lucifer was standing in front of the mirror, smoothing over every last wrinkle in his clothes. Today, he had made a conscious attempt at altering his appearance. Rather reluctantly, he had opted for a skintight, wine red turtleneck instead of one of his stiff dress shirts.

It was the easiest solution to his problem, considering the sigil that was becoming ever more noticeable by the minute sat right in the middle of his neck. His other options would have been to either us concealer, which seemed like too much of a hassle, or wear bandages around his neck the entire day. And that, he was not willing to put up with.

Additionally, it would be far too obvious that something was up if all of a sudden, Lucifer started to wear medical grade bandages when out in the open when nothing was supposed to be wrong with him. Most certainly, that was not a fashion statement he would ever make with a clear mind. Perhaps Mammon would be foolish enough to think a simple bandage would be enough to cover up the physical representation of one of the bigger failures of his life, but Lucifer was smarter than that.

The bright orange pill bottle was sitting on his dresser, staring Lucifer down mockingly as if to say: _See? This is what you get for letting loose, this is what you get for stepping out of your comfort zone_. Lucifer refused the sudden urge to grab it and throw it against the wall, taking satisfaction in the way the plastic container chipped into pieces and the suppressants spilled all over the floor. Before he could follow his silent threat with actions, there was a sudden sharp knock on his door. Just so the unexpected guest could have even the slightest of chances of walking in on Lucifer having a stare down with a pill bottle with his own damn name on it, he crammed it into the upper drawer of his dresser and slammed it shut.

„Yes, come in,“ he said loud enough for the guest to hear as soon as he was done.

The door opened and Barbatos entered the room with fierce yet quiet steps, the heels of his shoes clacking softly on the marbled floor. „Thank you, Lucifer.“

Although Lucifer hadn't expected to meet Barbatos today, he found himself fundamentally unsurprised. Sooner or later he would have expected him to come see him anyway. Admittedly, he would have preferred to have a face to face with Barbatos rather later than sooner, but there was nothing for him to do about that now. All he could do was get this approaching awkward conversation over with.

Without waiting for Barbatos to to state his business, Lucifer dropped all pretence as he faced Diavolo's trusted butler. „I assume my doctor has contacted you about the medication?“ he asked, though in all honesty it was more of a statement than an inquiry.

In certain cases it was policy for doctors to relay any changes in medication to the patient's superior. This whole system had been set in place to reduce certain accidents happening due to some medication's side effects and the effect they could possibly have on other demons. Suppressants belonged right in that category since - how many other magic infused medications - they were known to sometimes trigger bad reactions in other demons. All in all, Lucifer had known what to expect.

Barbatos nodded his head. „She has.“

„Am I right in assuming that you were already aware of it?“

„You are correct in that assumption, indeed.“

Lucifer sighed as he walked over to his dresser and took the pill bottle out of the drawer, putting it down on the desk in front of Barbatos without saying anything.

Barbatos picked up the pill bottle and inspected it closer. His lips moved in silence as he scanned the list of ingredients, mouthing the words without saying them as he was reading. After he was done he handed the pill bottle over to Lucifer again. „I do not think these are going to cause any irreversible problems. You have started taking them already, I presume.“

Lucifer took the pill bottle and turned it over in his hand. „ Yes, I already took one,“ he replied and screwed the lid open. He took out another one of the tiny little pills and swallowed it dry. „As you can see I am indeed taking them. There is no need to watch me like a hawk.“

Barbatos mustered Lucifer with that all-knowing yet unreadable gaze of his. „I don't doubt that. Still, that leaves one quandary.“ Taking one step closer towards Lucifer, Barbatos considered his colleague and friend for a second. „When will you tell Lord Diavolo?“

This was the exact question Lucifer had dreaded the most. Even after hours of staring at the ceiling as he was lying on his bed, Lucifer had not managed to come up with an answer to that one question he knew would inevitably come up. After all, he had no intentions whatsoever of telling Diavolo about what had happened that night.

Having to pass Diavolo in the hallway and feeling the tense energy between them was bad enough. It was uncomfortable, but Lucifer could handle it. However having to confess to Diavolo, his superior, one of his oldest friends, that he had formed a mating bond with him during a one night stand, of all things, was right out of the question.

Lucifer knew his feelings were out of place, so he refused to verbalize them. If he did, that would make them undeniably real.

Barbatos noted the silence and interpreted it accordingly. He wished he could show Lucifer all of the possible futures he had seen based on him confessing his truth. Alas, he could not do that.

Also, wouldn't that take the fun out of all of this?

Barbatos highly disliked seeing both of his friends, Diavolo and Lucifer, in such turmoil caused by both of their stubbornness, yet he also knew it was not his place to intrude. They had to figure it out themselves. All he could do was push their limits bit by bit and rely on the fact that even though both of them were quite difficult in their own ways, fated lovers generally found themselves one way or another.

He took note of Lucifer's attire and smiled a little. For someone like him, who recognized most changes in patterns as ways of distraction, no matter if to deflect or strengthen truths, it was quite clear Lucifer was attempting to hide a certain fact that he didn't feel quite comfortable with. So, Barbatos concluded, the change in fashion was definitely related to Lucifer's newborn bond to Lord Diavolo.

„Your sigil?“

As predicted, Lucifer pulled down the collar of his turtleneck and right there, at the base of Lucifer's neck, now exposed, was the sigil, that undeniable proof of their bond, made up of broad strokes and timid lines, still infantile in its newborn nature.

„It is quite breathtaking,“ Barbatos mentioned and Lucifer quickly pulled the collar up again.

„A nuisance is what it is. It shouldn't even be there in the first place,“ Lucifer spat out, the conflicted tone to his voice far too apparent.

„I am certain Doctor Naamah has explained to you that you are not allowed to take these medications for longer than a month, yes? So I would be enlightened to hear your plan of action.“

Although talking about his on-sided mating bond was about the last thing Lucifer wanted to do, he found a certain calamity in knowing the one person to bring it up was Barbatos. Although the demon loved to push Lucifer's boundaries in his own certain way, Lucifer could be sure that Barbatos would keep quiet about it unless he absolutely had to talk about it.

„I will use this month to figure out what to do about this. As you probably have figured out already, I would rather not tell Diavolo. We need him to focus on his duties. Knowing that he is the reason for my,“ Lucifer cleared his throat and averted his gaze for a moment. „Ailment, as one would call it, would prove to be counter productive. I shall find a way to get rid of all of this before it turns into a problem for him,“ Lucifer stated ever so profusely.

Barbatos struggled with the urge to interfere and simply resigned himself to nod with an unreadable expression on his face. _Diavolo is not the only demon we should be worried about_ , he wanted to say, but bit his tongue instead.

He could tell Lucifer was ready to carry this burden all by himself, especially because he had gotten affirmation from Doctor Naamah that in the end, he was going to be the sole demon negatively impacted by the sigil.

Even though Barbatos felt the unmistakable need to interfere, he was too aware of the fact that in the end, there was no demon except for him who was aware of how important it was to hold back when it was needed, even if the people most affected by it were two of his closest friends.

“I am going to be frank with you, Lucifer,” Barbatos started. “Although you are akin to a brother for me, I struggle to believe in your words. I am not calling you a liar, I am attempting to tell you that you are trying to deceive yourself. What would be the worst outcome if you told Lord Diavolo about what had happened? I believe you are aware of the fact that he is quite enamoured with you.”

Lucifer turned the pill bottle over and over in his hand, focusing on the way his name on the label disappeared and reappeared as he turned the bottle over and over before finally setting it down on his mahogany desk again.

“The worst outcome is him knowing that in the end, I have failed my duties. As you know, I promised him my loyalty when he showed mercy and saved Lilith. I have promised to be his loyal right-hand man ever since. Now, I find myself conflicted in-between my duties and my desires.”

_When have I become so daring that I thought I could deserve Diavolo's benevolence, although I am not much more than his devoted servant?_

When had Lucifer become weak enough, unable to resist lingering glances and warm touches? He was supposed to be above all that. He was supposed to be able to restrain himself and act as Diavolo's diligent right-hand man, immune to all the allures the world had to offer, but apparently, when it was about Diavolo Lucifer had no choice but to give in. He found himself a slave to Diavolo's advances, no matter how much they would hurt them in the end. There was no saying no to those mesmerizing golden eyes.

Barbatos cleared his throat and snapped Lucifer out of his thoughts by doing so. “Duties and desires do not necessarily have to end up in conflict, Lucifer. As much as I am Lord Diavolo's servant I am also your friend. I refuse to see either of you in pain, no matter how hard you refuse to see the truth.”

A slight pained smile ghosted over Lucifer's face. “I appreciate the concern, but not even your words can redirect my thoughts. Diavolo's actions have shown me the truth within his intentions without much needed words. This is the way it happened to be, and I refuse to complain about it. I am neither a victim nor a survivor, I have been dismissed after having revealed too much when I should have kept quiet instead. Diavolo did nothing wrong. I was the one who allowed things to go too far.”

Barbatos looked at Lucifer with the slightest bit of pity in his eyes. There was nothing left for him to do here.

He gestured towards the pill bottle one last time. “As your friend, I am asking you to stick to the one month period, Lucifer. The both of us are quite aware of the consequences that shall ensue if you do not intend on sticking to the time frame.”

Lucifer mustered Barbatos one last time. Although he had no intentions of telling Diavolo what had happened, Lucifer also had no intentions of lying to Barbatos. After all, through the years the butler had become a strange, yet good friend.

He shook hands with Barbatos. “Thank you for your concern,” he said with a firm tone of voice. _But I simply cannot explain to Diavolo what has occurred that night. He does not deserve the burden of having to carry another's unrequited love when he is destined for means bigger than the both of us . For his good, I shall stay quiet and still. My silence on this specific topic is the one thing that shall never disgrace him._

So Lucifer bid farewell to Barbatos and stayed quiet and still until he heard the door fall shut.

After all, he was a soldier who had sworn to dedicate his life to this war. As long as he ended up serving his purpose, he would be alright in the end. Even if “alright” meant an undeniable death. Whether it would be caused by war or love, he couldn't tell, but Lucifer knew that either way, he had the chance to die in an honourable way.

In the end, all he wanted was to fulfil his duty and allow his brothers to live a life far better than his own. It didn't matter if Lucifer got wounded in the process. He was their oldest brother and no matter what, he would gift them the ability to live a life more carefree than his.

He was Lucifer the Morning Star, the oldest brother of eight who could not allow himself to take what he wanted, because for once, his pride was overruled by his sense of loyalty. If he had to remain quiet and suffer in deafening silence for his brothers, his friends and Diavolo, then he would happily do so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome to the end, today i don't have much to say except for:  
> This is a PSA!! I have seen many commenters assume that Lucifer is pregnant and despite me saying he is not, I am now here to officially say: he is neither  
> \- pregnant  
> \- knocked up  
> -having a bun in the oven  
> nor enceinte!!  
> although i don't have anything against mpreg this one is not mpreg!  
> cheers my lads  
> visit me on tumblr @leviathanswingman or on twitter @simpingshrimp


	7. Tripping Over Skeletons

The exact same day he had his one on one with Lucifer, Barbatos called a last minute student council meeting. Despite everything, it was his duty to inform the other demons of the fact that they had to be careful when in contact with each other. Here at RAD they generally handled cases like these through meetings to ensure that the person in question's privacy wouldn't be invaded. If they wanted to, they would have the opportunity to reveal themselves near the end of the meeting.

„Welcome,“ Barbatos started. „I apologize for calling in a meeting at such short notice. However, I have been made aware of the fact that one of the demons amongst our midsts has been put on magical medication. Therefore, I would like to remind all of you to be cautious around each other.“

The room quickly filled with quiet whispers. Diavolo, who had been standing next to Lucifer in silence for a while, bumped shoulders with Lucifer who refused to jump in surprise. „Did you know about this?“ he whispered and Lucifer shook his head, his lips pressed together in a straight line.

It was almost impossible to lie to Diavolo, the demon could always tell whenever someone was trying to deceive him with their words, so begrudgingly Lucifer resorted to lying by omission instead.

Lying to Diavolo He hated having to do it, but in the end, what other choice did he have? Confess that his loyalty had been exposed as undeniable enamoredness in the course of one night? Certainly not.

„You know better than to talk during meetings,“ he whispered back sternly as he threw Diavolo a side glance.

Right, he realized. This was the first actual conversation they'd had in days. Was this what their relationship had turned into?

As the murmurs quieted down again Barbatos continued. „There is no need to panic. Keep a close eye on each other and if you notice anyone acting out in a suspicious manner please send them to me. I would now like to ask if the person in question would like to reveal themselves to make things easier for all of us.“

Lucifer crossed his arms and let his gaze wander across a room that was once again clad in complete silence, faking interest. His eyes locked with Barbatos' for a moment and suspecting the question on the other demon's mind, Lucifer shook his head ever so slightly, only for Barbatos' eyes to see. There was no way he would reveal his current weakness to the entire student council, his brothers included, and Lucifer was certain Barbatos was ever so aware of that fact. Still, he had quietly asked again, a simple plead for some common sense.

A minute or so passed.

“Alright, then,” Barbatos concluded. “I suppose there's nothing else of importance, so this concludes the end of tonight's meeting. Remain safe.”

As soon as Barbatos had ended the meeting absolute pandemonium broke loose. After all, there weren't too many ailments which required a demon to take magic induced medicine, more commonly known as MagiMeds™ . So of course, everyone started to debate on what might be the reason for it almost immediately.

Lucifer took note from afar of how his brothers huddled up in a big pile of conspiracy. As usual, he found himself disappointed yet not surprised and had to physically restrain himself from chewing them out. However, he couldn't afford to look too eager since right now, everyone was looking at each other with a certain sense of suspicion. So Lucifer rolled his shoulders back, taking satisfaction in the small crack he heard, and remained right in place.

He turned to Diavolo and sighed. “How truly troublesome,” he remarked.

“Indeed,” Diavolo answered, his eyes fixed to the ground. There was a strange silence between them for a moment. “It's been a while since the last one,” he eventually said.

“You are right.”

Thankfully, Barbatos approached them just then. “Young Master, Lucifer. How do you fare? Excuse me for not notifying you earlier about this issue, but I was fairly preoccupied.”

The arrival of Barbatos thankfully took care of the awkward air that had been threatening to suffocate Diavolo and Lucifer.

The demon prince cleared his throat. “Well, hello Barbatos. What an interesting course of events. I have already talked to Lucifer about this just now, but it has been quite the while since we've had an incident like this one. I know it's not really my place to ask, but would you mind telling me what kind of MagiMeds we are talking about here? Diavolo chuckled lightly. “You can't blame me for being curious! Please?”

For a moment Barbatos seemed to mull it over. His eyes wandered inconspicuously over to Lucifer, who let out the smallest of sighs before blinking once ever so slowly, a sign for only Barbatos to see.

Lucifer didn't see any reason as to why this should be kept from Diavolo. As long as his own name remained at a comfortable distance from the topic, it was alright to indulge Diavolo for once.

After all, if something managed to catch Diavolo's attention, there was no keeping him away from it. Diavolo would hold onto it tightly and refuse let go of it before he had gathered every single piece of information he could find on it. He was curious to a fault.

“Alright, my lord, but I shan't reveal anything more. You know I prefer to remain quite professional.”

Diavolo's eyes lit up like fairy lights and he grabbed Barbatos' hands in all of his excited glory.

Without any warning, Lucifer felt a stabbing pain run through the back of his neck. Reflexively, his hand shot upwards.

Barbatos mustered Lucifer with a knowing expression as he gently removed Diavolo's hands from his own. “Alright, my lord. It seems the magical medication in question is a special brand of bond-suppressants. A case of unplanned bonding, I have heard.”

Lucifer leaned his back against the table as he watched the interaction before him with intent eyes. Slowly, the pain in the back of his neck simmered down to a dull ache. He let his fingers run over the sigil hidden behind the thin material of his turtleneck, daring enough to trace it-that-shall-not-be-seen right in front of Lord Diavolo himself. If he wasn't so terribly opposed to the word in his own context, Lucifer would almost describe the action as soothing.

He kept his head held high and his nosed turned up as he took in Diavolo's reaction and tried his hardest not to let his perfectly constructed mask of glass fall.

“An unplanned bonding?!” Diavolo exclaimed in outrage. “That can happen?”

Barbatos nodded. “Yes, my lord. In the rarest of cases, when an emotional connection between partners has been denied or ignored for too long, their bodies might act on their own the second they are given the slightest of chances. Say you have two close friends who have denied their feelings for years and suddenly share a deep, meaningful moment. In a case like that there is the possibility their auras will latch onto each other, thus forming an unplanned bond. However, this proves much more difficult than the conscious forming of a bond. After all, if the partners are unaware that they have formed a bond, they will most likely not know to follow the bonding rituals. Side effects such as nausea, headaches and irritability can occur and suppressants will have to be used to deal with those side effects until the bonding rituals are either fulfilled or abandoned until the bond withers and dies on its own.” Barbatos smiled almost sadly. “Oh my, it seems as if I have been going on for quite a while, my apologies.”

Diavolo shook his head. “No, you have been very thankful, Barbatos,” he said as a contemplative look crossed over his face. “But to think that something like that could happen... I feel sorry for our fellow demon who has to suffer from this fate. It sounds lonely,” he said.

For a second Barbatos stayed quiet as he watched his Master while Lucifer pushed himself off the table and joined the conversation.

“It is very _you_ to say that such an experience would be lonely,” he threw in as he approached Diavolo and Barbatos. “I would rather think it a nuisance, having to wait out such pestering symptoms until the bond has finally latched itself off. I do not see how that would be lonely rather than highly bothersome.” His eyebrows were drawn together in what most would interpret as annoyance, but was actually something else entirely.

Although Lucifer had told himself to stay out of the conversation, Diavolo's comment had struck him in a wrong way. Not that it was Diavolo's fault since he was still remaining blissfully unaware of what was going on with Lucifer and inevitably himself. In the end, a sigil would carve itself into Diavolo's skin as well, no matter what. All in all, it was a harsh reminder.

Diavolo smiled, happy to get to talk to Lucifer again like they used to. “That is fairly typical of you to say as well, Lucifer, but come on! Even you would be shaken by something like that!”

Lucifer's jaw was locked tight. He could feel his head brimming with shambled thoughts and his skin itch with a certain irritability.

If Diavolo only knew. With a deep breath Lucifer tried to calm himself down and ignore the way his body practically buzzed with troublesome energy.

“Who knows,” Lucifer eventually answered rather dismissively as his eyes wandered over to Diavolo's face. For a moment their eyes met and in that exact moment, an electric shock ran through his body and his eyes shot open in shock for a moment. Weirdly enough, Diavolo's eyes mirrored the same shock that must have been ever so apparent in Lucifer's eyes.

“Lucifer...” Diavolo eventually started, his hand reaching out towards his trusted right-hand man. The pads of his fingertips just so much as lightly touched Lucifer's cheek before Diavolo pulled his hand back again, suddenly fluttered.

Lucifer thought his heart was about to stop. As soon as Diavolo had come closer to him that strange buzzing feeling in his body had almost come to an overflow. His body felt locked in place and Lucifer hated every second of it.

Luckily, Barbatos had been watching ever so closely and had immediately caught on to what was happening, allowing him to swoop in and help out.

“My Lord, may I remind you, now that the meeting is over, that you are far behind on your paperwork? You wouldn't want to cause Lucifer any more trouble than he already has, am I right in assuming so?”

These few seconds were all Lucifer needed to snap out of it. With Diavolo's attention now on another subject, Lucifer felt his body relax again. The tip of his pointer twitched restlessly and then, as if a flood gate had been opened, his strength returned in a violent rush, shoving Lucifer forward a little.

Inconspicuously, he fixed his posture and put a slight smile on his face as he heard Diavolo whine to Barbatos about his tasks muted in the back.

“I will take my leave now,” he said. “If I slack off today I will fall behind on my paperwork.” He threw Diavolo an apparently stern look. “We don't like falling behind on paperwork now, do we?”

Diavolo visibly slouched down. “But, Lucifer...”

Lucifer lifted his hand to put it on Diavolo's shoulder reassuringly, but stopped himself mid-air as he realized what he was doing. He cleared his throat as he let his arm fall back to his side. “Finish your assignments quickly and you are free to do as you please.” After a second, he looked directly into Diavolo's eyes. “Show some restraint and you will be alright,” he mumbled almost quietly before nodding towards Barbatos and Diavolo and heading out.

He left the conference room with quick strides.

Finally left to his own devices, he allowed his thoughts to flow freely. With every step he took he could feel the vibrations of his feet hitting the ground, tingling and buzzing as his heart beat too fast and the nausea returned to his body. Lucifer kept going like that until he found himself safe back in the safety of his own four walls.

He stomped over to his dresser, unlocked the upper drawer and pulled out the orange pill bottle with much force.

During their little talk one thing had become rather obvious to him: One pill wasn't even remotely enough to suppress whatever it was he felt for Diavolo. Truthfully, he felt putting a name on their relationship would cheapen it in its nature, so Lucifer simply refused to. No matter how hard it aggravated him, he couldn't.

Lucifer shook two pills out into his empty palm and stared them down for a moment. He shouldn't, but for the first time in a long time, his emotions were speaking louder than his words. And that, Lucifer just couldn't agree with.

He threw back both pills at once before heading out of his room. Perhaps he should just go and get some of his work done. Perhaps being productive was exactly what he needed to clear his mind of thoughts of crimson hair and soft fingers on his cheek.

As he was heading towards his study Lucifer slowly felt the suppressants doing their job. The nausea subsided again and the strange buzzing sensation he had felt on his skin had now mostly let up as well. In many ways, he felt better, yet in different ways, he felt worse.

Although by nature, Lucifer was not what most would describe as a warm person, he felt downright chilly to the core. A certain numbness seemed to slowly encase his body and the second Lucifer felt it, he knew he despised it. It felt invasive and wrong.

Still, if those uncomfortable sensations were a necessary step on his way to getting rid of the bond, he had no choice but accepting it.

After all, when it was about the bond, Lucifer had never had a choice to begin with. All he was expected to do was put up with the pain and the discomfort until the bond would inevitably release Diavolo from its suffocating grip.

Lucifer massaged his aching shoulders as he arrived in front of his study, stepped into it and immediately turned up the heating before sitting down to work on some papers. He allowed himself to lose himself within the rhythm and comfort of work for several hours before he heard a slight tapping coming from his door. Confused, he lifted his head and listened. There again, he heard a soft rapping at his door.

“Yes?” he answered, trying not to sound annoyed despite definitely feeling bothered. No answer. Satan and Belphegor were probably trying to prank him again. _Not today, Satan, not today_.

Lucifer took a deep breath before getting up and ripping the doors open. “WHO-” he started to shout until he saw who the supposed prankster was.

“Diavolo?”

The demon in question was standing next to the door, his hand still resting on the door frame, with an uncharacteristically perplexed expression on his face. “Good... evening?”

Lucifer scrambled to collect himself again. “Excuse me, I didn't expect to see you here. I thought you were one of my brothers, I apologize” he offered after the initial surprise and opened the door behind him a bit further in an inviting manner. “I assume you have something to discuss with me?” he asked although the squashed down panic in his heart tried to break through the thick fog of the suppressants. Though normally, having a blank page of emotions was comforting to him, now it instead put him at even more distress. The fact that he could not calculate his own reactions due to the MagiMeds threw Lucifer off.

“Yes, thank you,” Diavolo replied as he followed Lucifer into his study.

Lucifer leaned his back against the mahogany desk and lifted his gaze to match Diavolo's. Diavolo stared back at him, but did not say a word. Eventually, he groaned in frustration and spun around to lean against the desk next to Lucifer, standing shoulder to shoulder. Once again, Lucifer felt Diavolo's warmth heat up the side of his arm in an instant. Only then did he notice how cold his study actually was. The damn heater had stopped working again.

Diavolo took a deep breath. “I wanted to talk to you about Friday night.” He could feel the way Lucifer stiffened besides him.

“Of course,” he said cautiously and almost recognizably uncomfortable. If there was one thing he did not want to talk about, it was Friday night. Lucifer certainly didn't feel like witnessing the exact situation he had avoided to think about for hours upon hours. Still, a part of him felt weirdly unbothered, felt strangely calm despite the situation, almost as if he were floating up on the ceiling, watching himself interact with Diavolo.

“Friday night-”

“You acted out on a whim,” Lucifer interrupted him with his gaze fixed to one of the floor tiles. He could tell the suppressants had fully set in by now, because he felt nothing at all. For a moment Lucifer simply sat there and took in the beating of his heart and the stream of cold air ghosting over his skin, feeling strangely detached. Despite all of his and the suppressants' best efforts to suppress his emotions, there was one undeniable truth.

His body was aching for Diavolo's presence.

 _If only he had the right to touch him_. But could he really allow himself to do just that? Had he not sworn his utmost loyalty to Lord Diavolo? Was him giving in to this shaky bond a betrayal of its own perhaps? Or was him staying quiet about it maybe even more of a betrayal?

Diavolo's shoulder pressing into his own felt good, felt natural. Right now, the feeling of skin against skin stood in stark contrast to Lucifer's emotions, which were buzzing like static on a TV.

Then and there, Lucifer decided to ditch the MagiMeds. What kind of demon would he be if he couldn't withstand a good amount of pain in favour of staying himself instead of a drugged down zombie?

Lucifer didn't find the strength in himself to move away, so he stayed. It was almost as if his body had superglued itself onto Diavolo's, holding onto every sweet second of touch it could get.

“No,” Diavolo suddenly said. “Well, I mean also a bit yes, but. What I wanted to say was...”

“Diavolo,” Lucifer intercepted uncomfortably. “We don't have to talk about this. It's fine.”

Diavolo tapped his thigh in an almost nervous fashion. “No, Lucifer. You deserve better, I really have to apologize.”

Lucifer, if possible, tensed up even more. “Diavolo, you _really_ don't have to-”

There wasn't much to apologize for now, was there? In the end, he had only done something quite normal. Diavolo certainly wasn't the first demon to flee the bed in the wee morning hours and he most definitely wouldn't be the last. Lucifer was the one who felt like he was supposed to apologize, yet found himself unable to do so. After all, how does one apologize for something the other person isn't even aware of just yet?

Diavolo took a deep breath and placed his hands firmly onto Lucifer's shoulders and faced him. He opened his mouth as if he was about to say something, but then closed it again only to lick his lips nervously.

Lucifer tried not to stare, but was immediately distracted by the way Diavolo's warm hands felt through the flimsy material of his wine red turtleneck. Ever so unhelpfully, his brain supplied him with flashing images of _that_ night, pulling up memory after memory of Diavolo's fit form in the dark and the way his skin had tasted against his lips.

Finally, Diavolo had gathered himself enough to talk. “What I did to you was cruel. I shouldn't have left like that, but I panicked. You know me better than anybody else and are my closest friend, so how could I not have? Lucifer, we're talking about you here.” Carefully, he reached up towards Lucifer's face and cupped his cheek. “I need you in my life.” The pad of his thumb ran along smooth skin and Lucifer repressed a deep shudder.

Lucifer's body and mind were in a conflicted battle. Although he could feel the indisputable pull his body had towards Diavolo's, the suppressants forced his emotions into an uncomfortable state of insensibility. Despite all of that, Lucifer knew he was a goner, no matter how much he fought against it. He was devoted to the core, no matter how much he got hurt.

“It's alright,” he said as he reached up and placed his hand onto Diavolo's. “You are not to blame.”

For a moment, he felt awkward standing there like that, the two of them all by themselves when Lucifer had sworn to keep his distance. Perhaps this was where his devotion to Diavolo and his own determination inevitably interfered with each other.

Another moment passed before both of them realized what kind of situation they were in. As Lucifer let go of his grip on Diavolo's hand the demon prince retracted his arm to his own side as well.

“Are we good?”

Lucifer shook his head and allowed himself a low chuckle and a moment of sincerity. “Yes, Diavolo. No matter what, I'll always be by your side. I'll always be there, you know that.”

“Lucifer!” Diavolo suddenly exclaimed and threw his arms around Lucifer, who barely managed to refrain from stumbling to the ground. He dug his hands into the fabric of Diavolo's coat so he wouldn't fall to the ground. “I was so worried!”

Lucifer was overly aware of Diavolo's arms, crossed behind his neck, resting upon that cursed sigil. Reassuringly, he patted Diavolo's back as his body was filled with a tingling sensation, starting at the back of his neck and spreading throughout his every limb. Lucifer knew better than to fight it. “You are overreacting.”

Diavolo quickly pulled back and stared at Lucifer. “I am not! You know I don't lie. I would never lie to you. Never ever.”

Lucifer wished he could say the same about himself.

Guilt was a nasty thing gnawing at his innards.

Although morally, he knew he should tell Diavolo about their bond, realistically, he simply couldn't. A sigh escaped his lips as he ignored the way his bones were buzzing, almost vibrating in the presence of Diavolo. It was quite the discerning feeling.

“I am glad we had this talk,” he said in answer. “It's good to know there is no bad blood between us. That would be quite the bother.“

Diavolo beamed at him. “Definitely! Oh, Lucifer, this reminds me of this thing I overheard Solomon and Yuuta talking about. I think they called it 'kissing the homies goodnight'?

Lucifer tensed up again. He hated that due to his brothers' shenanigans he knew exactly what Diavolo was alluding to and even more than that, he hated the implications of Diavolo's carefree statement.

“Please don't even joke about that,” Lucifer forced out without any hesitation.

Diavolo tilted his head in confusion, but before he could ask about it, Lucifer was hit by another particularly painful shot of pain running through his neck. He barely managed to suppress a hiss.

“Would you mind leaving me alone now? I still have a lot of paperwork to go through, as have you,” he forced out.

With a strange expression on his face, Diavolo reached up and cupped the nape of Lucifer's neck, staring at him intently. “I guess there is no way for me to get out of this one?” he finally asked, his palm warm and heavy on Lucifer's skin, his eyes big and pleading. Although he hated to admit it, the feeling of Diavolo's hand flush against the back of his neck, unknowingly cradling that sigil felt far too good, far too comforting.

“Go back to your work, Diavolo,” Lucifer answered.

 _Your puppy eyes don't work on me_ , he thought.

Diavolo sighed before performing a lazy mock salute. “At your service.”

Lucifer's heart beat ever so irregularly as he watched Diavolo, in all of his glory, leave his study. As soon as the doors closed behind Diavolo's broad back, Lucifer's knees caved in and he fell to the ground, his only support being his hand holding onto his mahogany desk with whitened knuckles. Deep breaths escaped his lips as his body tried to adjust to the absence of his mate ever so desperately.

As Lucifer grabbed onto the edge of the desk, his head suddenly filled with static and his sight turned dark. Before he knew what was happening, his head hit the cold, marbled floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys, gals and nonbinary pals! So yeah, basically I could've been done with this chapter two days ago but I really hated what I'd written, so instead I rewrote the full last half of the chapter. Now I am actually happy with the chapter, who would've thought!Like really, the original draft was wack and I am glad that no one except for me got to see it.  
> Anyway, thank you for reading, come visit me on my tumblr @leviathanswingman .(not me refusing to drop my twitter @ bc twitter annoys me at the moment big oof)  
> Kudos, comments and criticism are highly appreciated, I hope you have a nice day, king/ queen/ royal!


	8. I Break The Spell

In retrospect, Diavolo should have known there was trouble in the air. There had been myriads of signs, yet he had foolishly decided to remain blind in favour of avoiding an uncomfortable truth he was unwilling to face.

The moment those doors closed behind Diavolo's back and the off-putting silence was filled with the unmistakable echo of a dull thud, Diavolo was forced to recognize that every single one of his actions, no matter how little or seemingly insignificant, had its consequences.

He caught himself thinking back, and the more thought he put into it, the more he grew aware of his own foolishness.

Diavolo was less than thrilled when Barbatos had revealed the plan for the evening he had come up with in collaboration with Simeon. A night out at one of the hottest clubs in town, just Diavolo, Barbatos, Simeon and Solomon. Good grief.

Surely, their intentions were pure at heart, after all Diavolo had spent the entire day holed up in his room, wallowing in his own royal pity.

He had just made one of the biggest mistakes of his life, so he should confidently be allowed to pity himself for a good minute or two.

He had to face reality and remind himself that he had slept with Lucifer. Out of all the irrational choices Diavolo had made in his entire life, this might have been by far the most self destructive one. Normally, people would be thrilled, no, even elated to become one with their most beloved. For Diavolo though, what was generally supposed to be a joyous occasion had turned one of his most important relationships upside down. It did not matter how deeply Diavolo wanted him, he was terribly aware of how keen Lucifer was on keeping their relationship strictly professional.

The one thing Diavolo could allow himself was meaningful side-glances and hands brushing against each other ever so accidentally as they walked side by side. He knew he should feel fulfilled by all of that, yet desire was keeping hold of his heart; there were these bony fingers with nails the exact shade of fresh blood tightening around that beating little thing of his that caused nothing but unwarranted trouble.

In spite of everything, Diavolo's feelings for Lucifer were one of the Devildom's most badly kept secrets and often-whispered rumours. To be completely honest, he himself didn't contribute all that much to stop the spreading of said rumour. Call it laziness or his disdain for telling lies, both assumptions were correct in their own little ways. Perhaps there was a part of him, however deeply hidden inside, that did not mind whatsoever. No, that fluttering part of his soul was filled with the undeniable need to make it known across all three realms just how adored and appreciated Lucifer was. How loved he was. Still, Lucifer was not _his_ , he had never been and would never be.

Gentle feelings had been living in Diavolo's heart ever since he'd first decided to put his trust in Lucifer. Along the way however, they had ever so seamlessly turned from feelings of pride into feelings of love.

Thinking back, he had never had much of a chance to begin with. It had been a race against time. Falling for Lucifer, that was.

And although Diavolo harboured these certain feelings for Lucifer, he knew better than to act upon them. Lucifer was as complex as the universe; stars cowered before the intensity of his light, the morning star, still shining bright and standing strong, smarter than life and more handsome than death itself.

However, and most importantly, Lucifer was not dumb. By now, he must have surely caught on to Diavolo's thinly veiled adoration. Lucifer being his ever so obedient self probably simply refrained from acknowledging the fact and now refused Diavolo ever so politely and professionally, in his own subtle ways.

So Diavolo had learned to stick to their untold boundaries, had learned to tease and to compliment and to form one of the most important relationships of his life, always with invisible boundaries in mind.

This specific friday night however, with the cold winter air kissing his cheeks, he had been made aware of how thin the ice he was moving on was when he had let his own warm fingers slip in-between Lucifer's icy ones. For a second, it had felt ever so divine.

Saturday morning, when he awoke in the early morning hours, entangled in silky sheets and surrounded by Lucifer's intoxicating scent, he could pinpoint the moment he broke through the ice and sank down to the mysterious depths of a dark yet comforting ocean, struggling for air.

As Diavolo laid on his stomach, naked as the day he was born, his exhausted head resting on his arms, he felt confusion corrupt his heart. Newly born eyes drifted over the man resting beside him. Diavolo's eyes roamed over Lucifer's sleeping form next to him and ever so suddenly, he felt the need to avert his eyes. Seeing Lucifer like this felt like a sight he did not have the right to enjoy.

Still, he could not refuse to reach out, his fingertips trailing across the sharp angles of Lucifer's jawline, tracing along soft skin on strong cheekbones, working their way up to swipe beneath Lucifer's eyes. Diavolo took in every smallest bit of detail he could hang onto; his almost sickly pale skin, slightly swollen lips, elegant hands resting next to his face, dark strands of hair falling into his face, beautiful like a renaissance painting. Lucifer's face, for once all relaxed and without any signs of stress, so calm, so pristine. He looked so much younger like this, so much more at peace.

At once, Diavolo found himself struck with a single question: Why?

Lucifer had never been one to engage in Diavolo's flirtatious invitations, no. Actually, he used to make sure to pull up borders between them, set up boundaries to keep the two of them from growing closer than what was deemed acceptable in his mind. So why? Why had he humoured Diavolo this time, why had he allowed to let passion take the lead for once ?

Uncertainty was thick in the air. What would happen once the spell was broken and Lucifer awoke, ready to reject anything that had happened between them just to revert back to a painful working relationship?

Perhaps it was foolish of him, but to avoid confrontation and his own inevitable heartbreak, Diavolo did the one and only thing his old man had taught him all those years ago. He ran away.

A day later, he was now holed up in his room, finding comfort in the certainty of silken sheets and warm blankets.

There was a knock on the door before Barbatos raised his voice.”Young Master, are you ready to leave? We need to make haste.”

Diavolo suppressed a groan trying to emerge from the depths of his soul. “Barely, Barbatos. Barely,” he answered almost dramatically. He was aware of how childish this little act of defiance of his must seem, but after what had happened between Lucifer and him, he felt like he could allow himself this kind of luxury for a day or two, just until he felt either less ashamed or until he had come to terms with having gotten so close to the one person he could never truly have.

For the shortest of moments, he felt tempted to throw a little fit. If that was all he had to do to be allowed to stay at home, he would gladly do it. He was a prince after all, and that did come with its perks.

Of course, there would be no fooling Barbatos though, but it would at least get him off his back for the evening at last.

In the end, that wouldn't do him any good though. Living in absolute denial was easy, but to move on, Diavolo knew he had to step out of his comfort zone and admit to his wrongdoings. And maybe Barbatos and Simeon were right, perhaps it would do him good to get distracted a bit.

Begrudgingly, Diavolo got up, shuffled towards his dresser and put on the clothes Barbatos had picked out for him. Leather pants and a black dress shirt adorned with crimson roses, fair enough. Diavolo made himself presentable in a routinely fashion. As he was done, he stared at his reflection in the mirror, only to be left vis-a-vis with a stranger.

He had always been so sure of his own strength of mind, of his own restraint, yet now that he'd broken one of his biggest rules, he failed to recognize the demon in the mirror staring back at him. With a bothered sigh Diavolo picked himself up again and snapped out of it.

His dear friends were waiting for him. Only bad hosts would make their precious friends wait.

A twenty minute ride later, Barbatos, Simeon and Diavolo arrived at one of the Devildom's hottest clubs. Even outside, demons and other creatures were mingling, some with drinks in their hands and others without, apparently having the time of their lives.

Diavolo couldn't help but feel suffocated. How exactly any of this was supposed to cheer him up was nothing less than a mystery to him, but he still appreciated Simeon and Barbatos' attempt at gifting him an enjoyable evening, even though he most certainly would have preferred to spend the remainder of the night by himself buried in silken sheets. Not that there was much to change about that now.

It was well near midnight and the rather small building seemed to practically vibrate with music, sweat and an uncomfortable heat, only adding to Diavolo's avid reluctance to be there to begin with.

Solomon was waiting for them, clad in a leather jacket, standing next to a clearly overwhelmed bouncer. As they all approached, the demon froze in place before greeting the group accordingly. Quickly, he started to press stamp after stamp onto the back of their hands before anyone could protest. The club's mark shone bright red in the darkness. Diavolo tried to admire it for a moment but all he was reminded of were those piercing red eyes, set aflame, looking up at him from the comfort of silken sheets and quiet moans.

Simeon placed his hand atop of Diavolo's shoulder to lead him to the table they had reserved. “Let's go inside and see what's happening,” he said with a pretty smile which Diavolo didn't appreciate all that much at the moment. Still, he obliged and followed the angel into the overfilled club. As they entered they found themselves surrounded by whispers and mumbling. After all, both Simeon and Diavolo had quite the reputation and were well known across the lands.

Solomon, being the one most familiar with the club due to multiple nights out with Asmodeus, lead the way towards their table.

Diavolo suppressed a sigh. Normally, he knew better than to show himself in public looking this miserable, yet this night, he simply couldn't bring himself to put on a smile either. He was currently facing the crisis of a possibly crumbling relationship, a good amount of gloom seemed quite appropriate to him.

“There we are,” Solomon finally said as he motioned towards a table for four and stopped in his tracks. Diavolo swore he could hear the faintest train of curses leaving the sorcerer's mouth.

Upon surveying the room, Diavolo immediately zeroed in on the reason for Solomon's uncharacteristic reaction.

The table next to theirs, littered with several half-empty cups, was currently occupied by two men clinking their glasses together before indulging in their drinks. Without any hesitation one of them downed half of his drink while the other one took a solemn sip, looking rather miserable.

Out of all the places Diavolo could even consider running into Lucifer at, a sweaty night club was set dead last, yet somehow, fate had once again managed to betray Diavolo's trust in an epic fashion.

Despite his inner turmoil, Diavolo couldn't argue against the fact that Lucifer looked ravishing, even though there was that certain look to his eyes that suggested a high level of discomfort. Guilt gnawed at Diavolo's conscience as he couldn't help himself but feel responsible for that. He wanted to do nothing more than run to him, cradle his face and make everything bothersome go away. However, he refrained from doing so. To be perfectly honest, he could not place what their relationship was at the moment. After that night, nothing was certain anymore. Years upon years of suppressed feelings had finally boiled over in one night of glorious intimacy. Perhaps, Diavolo should have seen it coming. He was terribly impulsive by nature, and going against his own flow rarely worked out in his favour.

Diavolo looked at Lucifer and before he could so much as start to worry about how he should act now, their eyes met and Lucifer -ever so prim and proper, all elegant in his skintight onyx turtleneck- choked on his drink. He quickly wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before he averted his gaze again. As he turned his head to talk to his little brother, the collar of his turtleneck shifted slightly, revealing the quietest hint of a hickey under his jaw.

A sad smile flashed across Diavolo's face. What he wouldn't give to turn back time and unmake all of that night's mistakes, for now he knew what it was like to have a taste of this otherworldly perfection, only for it to be cruelly taken away from him.

“Oh, Lucifer! It's rare to see you out of your office,” Simeon greeted. “In a club nonetheless.”

Diavolo watched the way Lucifer's eyebrows furrowed in slight annoyance. “I am solely here to keep an eye on Asmodeus,” he swiftly answered before taking another sip of his drink.

Barbatos, Diavolo, Simeon and Solomon joined the two demons at the almost vacant table in spite of the strange aura that seemed to surround them.

Slowly, they lost themselves in trivial conversations, and if Diavolo buried his head in the menu to avoid Lucifer's illegible gaze, then he would allow himself this foolish behaviour for one night before having to decide on what to do about the Lucifer situation. He spent the night sneaking glances while simultaneously avoiding to make eye contact with his right hand man, unable to face him yet but also unwilling to look away.

Several hours into the night Lucifer got up and left the table, turning his back to Diavolo as he headed towards a far-away corner of the club, probably to threaten Solomon, who seemed to have gotten himself in quite the situation with Asmodeus.

As Diavolo's eyes followed Lucifer's retreating figure, he spotted the faintest of lines peeking out of the collar which covered most of his neck, but had slid down a bit during the evening.

In that moment, Diavolo hadn't thought much of it. He was too occupied with the problem at hand, which was trying to find a way to fix what he had broken apart. So he shrugged off what he had seen as a fata morgana, as nothing but a mere illusion. His mind was probably just playing tricks on him.

Had he not been so distracted he would have taken note of the implications of those lines, still almost translucent in their newborn state.

The next time he saw Lucifer in more than passing was several days later due to Barbatos calling in an emergency student council meeting.

By then, Diavolo had made up his mind. To no surprise, a few days without any distractions, just him and his thoughts, were just what he had needed to come up with a solution.

All he had to do was apologize in complete sincerity. Lucifer deserved at least that much. He would apologize, he would do whatever was needed to set things right again.

Diavolo joined Lucifer's side, his right shoulder brushing against Lucifer's left one just as Barbatos opened the meeting.

Half-heartedly, Diavolo paid attention to the meeting. Apparently, someone on the council had managed to get themselves sick enough to be put on MagiMeds. Interestingly enough, the demon in question refused to reveal themselves. Not that they had to, but it was well known that it was generally the easiest way to fess up so you wouldn't inconvenience the rest of the council.

Normally, this would spark Diavolo's interest and he would find himself hell bent on finding out every single detail about the who, what, where and whys, but this day his mind was preoccupied with nothing but Lucifer.

After the meeting ended, Diavolo and Lucifer were joined by Barbatos. As they talked about the meeting, Diavolo found himself more interested in the matter the more Barbatos explained about the whole situation.

An unplanned bonding, he had called it. Something like this could only happen to the truly unfortunate. Diavolo expressed this sentiment to Barbatos just as Lucifer joined the conversation, his crimson eyes roaming over Diavolo's face, perhaps searching for something Diavolo himself wasn't aware of just yet. They talked, and even when faced with the hypothetical situation of an unplanned bond, Lucifer was being unapologetically, well, _Lucifer_. No one but him would write off an illness this logically and this removed from any sort of sentiment.

Diavolo didn't know whether to feel concerned or endeared, but in the end gave up on trying to figure out which one was the right one. After all, he was delighted to finally be able to talk to Lucifer again. Things weren't right just yet, but talking to him was already a step above pitiful pining from a safe distance.

Their eyes met for a moment and without any explanation, the strangest thing happened. Just as honey met glowing coals, a peculiar feeling ran through Diavolo's body. It felt almost as if he had been shocked by electricity; a subtle tingling followed by an uncomfortable buzzing. There was an additional stinging sensation running through his chest, right where his heart was. Subconsciously, Diavolo rubbed his chest to alleviate the discomfort.

Strangely enough, Lucifer's expression mirrored Diavolo's shocked one.

So he hadn't been the only one to feel it.

All at once, stronger than ever before, he was filled with the urgent need to touch Lucifer. Diavolo's heart was racing wildly, and without thinking about it, he reached out, the pads of his fingertips landing upon Lucifer's cheek, softly like the shyest of butterfly kisses. Diavolo felt another harsh sting run through his heart. There was no denying that he was absolutely helplessly in love with this man.

Suddenly flustered, Diavolo pulled his hand back again just as Barbatos joined them once again to pester, or perhaps remind Diavolo about his royal duties.

As Diavolo, thankful for the distraction, whined to Barbatos he noticed Lucifer twitching violently out of the corner of his eye, just once, before fixing his posture and rejoining their conversation as if nothing had happened whatsoever.

Diavolo decided not to comment on it, after all, it was nothing but a little twitch.

He paced back and forth in front of Lucifer's study. During the day, he had felt good about apologizing to Lucifer, almost excited even to fix their cracked relationship. Now though, that the time to take action had come, he found himself uncharacteristically nervous.

He was minutes away from being open about the fact that they had slept with each other, suddenly making it feel more like reality and less like a dream.

Just as Diavolo was leaning against the wall next to the door, mustering up enough courage to walk through that door, his pointer tapping against the door frame in a jumpy manner, the door flew open and Diavolo jumped out of the way right before he could be hit by the door.

“WHO-” A pissed off Lucifer was staring at him, his expression quickly changing to one of bewilderment as he realized who his visitor was. “Diavolo?”

“Good... evening?”

As Lucifer invited him, his face a blank canvas void of any sort of emotion, Diavolo felt his skin crawl. Whether this was his body telling him that something felt off or his brain trying to stop him from being a fool was unclear.

Distracted by the strange vibe he got, comforted by Lucifer's presence, disturbed by the look in Lucifer's eyes, Diavolo finally found the courage to apologize for his wrongdoings. Of course, it took two to tango -and tango they did- but Diavolo was ever so aware of the fact that all things Lucifer were deeply intricate and seriously complex matters. So as he had done so often before, he told Lucifer the truth by simply leaving out several crucial details.

Per his own rule, he refused to lie. However that didn't mean that he couldn't evade certain unspoken facts.

Lucifer was difficult, Diavolo knew that. They had strenuously built their relationship up from the ashes of a seemingly endless war, had gone from enemies to rescuer and rescuee, to allies, to friends up to something else entirely. And because of that, Diavolo knew he could not tell Lucifer the entire truth.

The relationship they'd had before that certain night had been fine. It had been safe despite those unspoken truths they often found in stolen glances and lingering touches. Diavolo was fine with pining as long as that meant he could keep Lucifer by his side. As long as Lucifer felt comfortable, he would be fine as well. They had been doing this spiel for decades now and Diavolo had gotten quite skilful at figuring out how far he could push their boundaries before they would inevitably crumble to the ground.

This was their little dance, he knew where to step and how to move just as Lucifer knew when to lift his right hand in unison with Diavolo's left one, palms mere inches apart as they slowly spun around each other to the soft tunes of solemn piano music.

Diavolo knew painfully well that the one thing he desperately wanted to say, he could not allow to be heard.

“I need you in my life,” he finally said after having apologized for what had happened. _You don't know how much I love you_ , he conveniently left out.

The air was cleared yet still, Diavolo couldn't shake the undeniable feeling of discomfort prickling up and down his spine. So he did what he knew best; he deflected.

“Oh, Lucifer! This reminds me of this thing I overheard Solomon and Yuuta talking about. I think they called it 'kissing the homies goodnight' ?”

The joke came bubbling out of his mouth before he could properly think about it, no matter how ridiculous it sounded. Lucifer fixed him with a strangely twisted expression. “Please don't even joke about that,” he forced out without any hesitation.

Once again, he twitched and before Diavolo could dismiss it again, he moved without thinking and cupped the back of Lucifer's neck.

There was no logical reason for him to do so, yet somehow, it felt completely and utterly right in the way it made his heart buzz and the palm of his hand tickle.

The moment was over as quickly as it had begun.

Diavolo was hastily sent off by Lucifer and as the door to his study closed behind him, he was able to breathe freely for the first time in days. The sensation of relief did not last for all that long though. As his mind was finally freed from the crushing weight of uncertainty, reality set in.

The moment those doors closed behind Diavolo's back and the off-putting silence was filled with the unmistakable echo of a dull thud, Diavolo was forced to recognize that every single one of his actions, no matter how little or seemingly insignificant, had its consequences.

“Lucifer?” he asked, but received no answer. There was no sound coming from the room whatsoever. Diavolo knocked multiple times in quick succession. “Lucifer?!” he asked, louder this time. Still, he received nothing except for an eerie silence.

An unsettling feeling started to bloom in the pit of his stomach. Throwing any resemblance of caution or appropriateness to the wind, Diavolo pushed the door to Lucifer's study back open.

He felt like his heart was ready to jump out of his chest as he took in the sight of an unresponsive Lucifer lying face-down on the floor. A pool of blood was slowly starting to form around his head, a deadly crimson halo standing in stark contrast against Lucifer's almost sickly looking, ashen skin.

“Lucifer!” Diavolo rushed to his side and carefully turned Lucifer's body around, cradling him with one arm as he pushed his hair aside to inspect the source of the bleeding. There was a big gash across his forehead, blood oozing out of it and dripping down the side of Lucifer's head, landing on the marbled tiles on the ground.

In the middle of his panicked state, Diavolo came to the hasty conclusion that he was an utter buffoon.

Deep down, he had felt uneasy whenever he looked at Lucifer. What he had written off as anxiety due to their broken relationship status, now turned out to be so much more than that. All along, there had been several red flags which Diavolo had foolishly written off as either coincidences or mere trifles.

Diavolo pulled Lucifer closer to his body as the air filled with ashes and embers and he transformed into his demon form. This time, he wouldn't fail Lucifer, he refused to.

He made sure that his grip on Lucifer was strong before he unceremoniously stepped around the desk and kicked in the large window, glass raining down onto the ground like sharpened tears.

Without any hesitation Diavolo, holding onto Lucifer's unconscious body like it was the most precious thing in the world, stepped onto the window sill and leapt off the edge. Big, leathery wings carried the both of them through the glowing lights of dusk.

Diavolo was getting Lucifer the help he so urgently needed and after that, he would find out what was going on with the demon he loved so ferociously.

It was time to face the facts. Diavolo couldn't keep on living in this false state of ignorance anymore. There was something going on with Lucifer, and as his closest friend and superior, it was Diavolo's job to find out exactly what that was.

There was still blood running down Lucifer's terrifyingly pale face as they landed safely next to a hidden cottage in the woods. They must have made quite the sight, the demon prince himself covered in blood, dishevelled by the wind, his right hand man Lucifer cradled in his strong arms, unconscious and certainly unwell.

Diavolo's heart was beating ever so quickly as he knocked on the door, his body coming down from the adrenaline as he waited impatiently.

Finally, he could make out movement from behind the door before there was the sound of a key turning in its lock and a head of pretty red curls peeked through the doorway. “Lord Diavolo?” the woman asked incredulously before her eyes moved downwards and landed on Lucifer's lifeless form.

“Oh gee!” Quickly, she turned her head around and shouted towards someone inside of the house. “Darling, I **told** you this was going to happen! It's Mister Lucifer, you know, the one from before!” She opened the door and motioned Diavolo to come inside. Diavolo simply followed suit. There would be time to ask questions later. Right now, his priority was Lucifer and nothing else.

A second woman hurried down the hallway, seemingly unimpressed by the picture in front of her as she quickly put on a pair of medical gloves. “Follow me.”

Diavolo followed her into what seemed to be an examination room. Although it was strange this woman had such a room inside of her own home, he decided to keep quiet about it for the moment.

“Put him down.”

Diavolo did as he was told and reluctantly took a step back as Doctor Naamah started to check Lucifer's vitals before treating his head wound. “Normally, I would have to ask you to leave the room, but considering the situation I'll make an exception,” Naamah muttered as she hurried across the room, yanking open several drawers in search of the correct medical supplies.

Diavolo leaned his back against the wall as he focused on the way Lucifer's chest rose and sank with every breath he took.

As he pushed back his hair, breathy laughter escaped his lips. “You couldn't get rid of me if you tried,” he said.

Naamah raised an eyebrow and chuckled. “My Lord, you better not test me.” There was a short moment of silence as she finished treating Lucifer's head wound. “He will be alright,” she started. “He is a fool, but he will be alright.” She beckoned Diavolo closer. “Lend me a hand here, I have to check his sigil.”

Diavolo halted in his steps. “What sigil, doctor?”

Quickly, Naamah's gaze shot upwards. “You don't know?” she asked incredulously. “Aren't you his superior? I made sure to give you a call about it since I put him on MagiMeds.”

He moved closer to Lucifer's body and helped the doctor turn him onto his side as his brain tried to process what had just been revealed to him. “My butler handles these sorts of things,” he eventually muttered.

Naamah pulled Lucifer's collar down as quickly as one would pull off a band aid, revealing a dark red sigil, tainted with splotchy black blots. “Oh, fuck!” she exclaimed in either surprise or shock, Diavolo wasn't too sure which one would've been more appropriate.

His head snapped around to the doctor as she examined the mark with careful fingers. Eventually, she sat up straight and faced Diavolo. “He is even more of a fool than I'd originally expected.”

For once, Diavolo found himself at a loss for words. His eyes were glued onto the alluring sigil on the back of Lucifer's neck. It all made sense now.

Before he could even think about it, his body moved on its own and he reached out, fingertips running along the pretty edges of this tainted sigil.

Naamah watched Diavolo closely as he had eyes for nothing but that ornate little thing on the back of Lucifer's neck. And just as his fingers had reached the epicentre of the sigil, Diavolo could feel a rush of electricity running through his body.

With a startle, Lucifer suddenly and unexpectedly awoke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey alexa, play yahoo by neil cicierega  
> so i'm kind of sorry for having disappeared for like 20 days after one time having uploaded tow times in a row but. that's exactly what i've been talking about when i said that i get inspired to write in very weird time intervalls. (some might call that mental illness but we're not gonna talk about that today)  
> I really looked forward to writing this chapter bc i generally like to include at least chapter that's from the other character's perspective, but this one threw me into writer's block and beat me to a pulp. but in the end, i managed! i literally wrote more than 3.5k words in a setting. also yes i brought back the lesbian doctors sue me.  
> thank you for not giving up on me while i needed to take some time to find the energy to write again, y'all make my day (my heart starts beating like crazy whenever i see the inbox notification bc i'm just like???? y'all like my stuff?? poggers) so yeah kudos and omments are always appreciated!  
> come visit me on tumblr @leviathanswingman where you can find me shitposting about things like. 80s aerobics instructor diavolo, for no logical reason whatsoever!  
> thanks for reading and please indulge me for a second and imagine the 7 brothers working out to olivia newton-john's physical. bye!!


	9. Drop The Guillotine

Lucifer felt a strange kind of peace he'd never felt before. Although perhaps, the words at peace weren't inherently correct to describe the sensation flooding his senses as he lay floating in the middle of a vantablack lake, surrounded by dark woods and even darker shadows.

He spread his fingers and let the murky water run through the gaps, relishing in the almost comforting feeling of forgiving liquid caressing his fingertips. Lucifer closed his eyes, but before he could even take his first deep breath, his body was already sinking to the ground and his lungs were slowly filling with gooey, bitter fluid. He tried to fight his way back to the surface, but his body was dragged to the ground by something bigger than life, a pillar of everything that could've been tied around his middle like a dead-weight.

Bubbles were escaping from his parted lips as he tried to take his last breath. Just as his body reached the murky ground, Lucifer noticed a light shining through the surface.

A hand, bright and colourful in this inky lake of nothingness, was reaching out to him and for some reason, Lucifer felt safe at once. Without any hesitation, he grabbed the hand tightly and felt himself being pulled up again.

With a startle, Lucifer awoke. Strands of hair were falling into his face as his body shot forwards and a drip of sweat ran down his temple. His breath came out in shallow gasps as one hand shot up towards his throat and the other gripped onto whatever was closest to him at the moment.

The room was spinning. His eyes darted back and forth as he took in the sight of his surroundings which were slowly coming to a halt, his heart beating ever so erratically. It took a few moments for his eyesight to clear up and become less disoriented again, but once it did, Lucifer felt the urgent need to curse.

He seemed to be sitting on some sort of examination table in what appeared to be a home praxis.

Sitting in front of him were two demons, one to his left, seemingly calm and composed, and the other to his right, looking dishevelled and upset. Doctor Naamah and Lord Diavolo.

Only now Lucifer realized that in his post wake up panic, he had grabbed onto Diavolo's forearm and to this moment hadn't let go of it. There were two possibilities as to what had happened: either his body had automatically sought out the most familiar thing in the room or that cursed bonding mark had detected the presence of its origin and grabbed onto it the second Lucifer's self control had slipped.

At once, Lucifer opened his hand and released his grip. For the shortest of moments, Diavolo and his eyes met. There was a certain question in those golden eyes, wet and slick, undeniably obvious and on full display. It was in this exact moment that Lucifer realized that his cover had officially and irrevocably been blown.

But instead of worrying about the chaos that would inevitably follow that realization, Lucifer decided to worry about his current situation first. When he tried to focus, he could still remember the strange aftertaste of an unfortunate dream, but not what had brought him to this place. His memory felt uncomfortably woozy and blotchy.

„Lucifer!“ Diavolo leant forward zealously, desperate and relieved at the same time. Without any hesitation, he grabbed Lucifer by the shoulders and pulled him towards his body, hugging him tightly, his eyebrows furrowed and eyes screwed close.

Despite everything, Lucifer could not help himself. After all -he realized disgruntledly- he was still bonded with Diavolo. Although he tried to deny his advances and refused to melt into the demon's touch, Lucifer felt _comforted_ by the sudden and unexpected physical contact. Yet still, no matter how much his body wanted this, he couldn't allow this to happen, no matter what.

“You can let go now,” he brought out and to his luck, Diavolo obeyed.

Lucifer's breath came out heavy and shallow as he tried to collect himself. His mind and body were at war, entangled in a ferocious battle with no victor in sight. No matter how much he desired to be with Diavolo, realistically he knew that he couldn't afford a luxury this expensive.

With every breath he took, Lucifer's chest rose and sank in an irregular rhythm. It took him another moment to take in his surroundings and relax considerably.

The first thing he had to do was figure out what exactly had happened after he had passed out and hit the ground.

Following, and more importantly, he would have to figure out what exactly Diavolo now knew. After all, Lucifer knew the future demon king well, sometimes perhaps even a bit too well. There was no way he had ended up bringing Lucifer to the doctor himself without there having been a damn good reason for it. Otherwise, he would've just sent Barbatos.

„Diavolo, what in the name of-“ he started and tried to push himself up, only to immediately be pushed back onto the examination table by Diavolo.

„Rest,“ Doctor Naamah's voice came sounding from Lucifer's left.

„That really isn't necessary,“ Lucifer countered in the blink of an eye, having already made up his mind about leaving as quickly as possible. What he needed was space, since generally speaking, space gave him enough time to come up with new plans and even newer excuses. And new excuses, he desperately needed if he wanted to keep his little problem a secret.

Worried, Diavolo tightened his grip on Lucifer's shoulders. „Lucifer, don't be ridiculous. We need to-“

„Oh no, my lord. Let him do as he pleases, it's fine,“ Doctor Naamah countered without moving from her spot at Lucifer's side. „You'll see.“

Although Lucifer still felt dizzy and drowsy, he swung his legs over the edge of the examination table, placed them on the ground and pointedly ignored the way his head started to spin as he lifted his body from the mattress. „There is no need to worry, I can handle myself.“

Diavolo, apparently unsure of what to do with his hands, simply watched him with that strange expression on his face. „You are pushing yourself, aren't you? Come, sit back down again, please,“ he threw in. No matter how hard he tried to forget it, whenever he looked at Lucifer and remembered the sight of that tainted sigil, he felt shivers run down his spine. Why had he been so hell-bent on hiding it? Wasn't Diavolo one of his most trusted companions?

„Although I appreciate your concern, I can assure you I am more than alright,“ Lucifer said stoically.

„More than alright? Lucifer, correct me if I'm wrong here, but being unconscious doesn't really classify as being even remotely alright in my book!“ Diavolo replied, frustrated. All he wanted was for Lucifer to get some rest so he could heal and finally be back in his life again. Perhaps this was a selfish thought, but Diavolo didn't feel all too guilty about having had it. He was long past the point of denying that he wanted to keep Lucifer all to himself.

Lucifer threw him a quick glance, opened his mouth to say something, but closed it again, apparently having changed his mind. He crossed his arms, stood up quickly and before he could even take as much as a step, he started to sway and almost took another swan dive if it hadn't been for Diavolo's quick reflexes.

Diavolo had leapt up from his chair and pulled Lucifer close to his chest, his own arms crossed safely over Lucifer's shoulders as they both took a tumble to the ground.

„See? I knew he wouldn't listen no matter what. Some people need to learn the hard way,“ Doctor Naamah said as she pushed her bangs aside, pinched the bridge of her nose and watched Diavolo pull Lucifer up with him again. „He's got a concussion, but he'll be alright as long as he gets enough rest and doesn't overexert himself.“

„A concussion?! There must be something you can do about that, right?! As long as it makes him all good again! “

„There is no need to coddle me like-“

Diavolo pushed his hair back with shaking fingers. „You looked like you were bleeding out,“ he forced out between clenched teeth. “I thought you were dying. Will you hold me at fault for worrying about you?”

As they kept on bickering, Lucifer ever so kept together despite his head injury and compromised appearance, Diavolo riled up yet still composed, Doctor Naamah watched them.

She threw another glance at Lucifer, who was clearly struggling to keep his balance, looking bothered by his body's lack of cooperation. His right hand travelled up around his neck until it stood at halt at the back of it, right where his tainted sigil was situated. He could most definitely feel that something was amiss.

Naamah watched her patient as he threw a glance at the demon prince and right in that moment, Naamah knew for a fact that she had been absolutely right in the assumption that Lucifer had bonded with none other than Lord Diavolo himself. She could see it in the way they looked at each other when they thought the other one wasn't paying attention. There was pure devotion in their eyes, the sort of foolish dedication one could only observe within fated lovers. However, Diavolo and Lucifer, no matter how powerful and smart they were, seemed to be utter fools when it was about love.

The doctor sighed. „Lord Diavolo, would you mind leaving us alone for a moment? There is something I need to discuss with Lucifer regarding his sigil.“

At the mention of the bonding mark Lucifer's shoulders tensed up and he pressed his lips together into a tight line. He threw Doctor Naamah a questioning look. „What happened to doctor patient confidentiality?“ he asked, breathing out sharply and rubbing his eyes in an exhausted, almost defeated manner.

Then, Diavolo suddenly chimed in. „She didn't break any laws, Lucifer. I saw your neck when she asked me to help her roll you over. There's no need to hide it anymore, I already know. I saw the sigil. I know this must be an awkward position for you to be in right now,“ he threw in, his voice quiet and soft, not upset anymore. However, there was a certain undertone to his voice that betrayed a sense of hurt, out of sight yet clearly not perfectly stashed away just yet. Although he tried very hard to be supportive and good, Diavolo felt crushed despite his good intentions. No matter how hard he tried to ignore his own feelings, the fact that he had always found Lucifer far too perfect and irresistible tainted his judgement like black ink on a clean sheet of paper.

An unreadable expression ran across Lucifer's face as his eyebrows furrowed and he averted his gaze. Diavolo could hear the way his heart-rate elevated in a matter of seconds. Was it something he said?

„Of course you do, Diavolo.“ Lucifer stated after a short moment of silence. „If you'll excuse us?“

With a short nod Diavolo exited the room, but his thoughts never left Lucifer's side. Something definitely felt off and he needed to find out what exactly that little something was.

As soon as the door fell closed, Lucifer exhaled deeply, his shoulders slumped and he almost immediately dropped his head into his opened palms. „Tell me what happened while I was unconscious. Fill me in, doctor,“ he mumbled as he dragged the palm of his hands down his face just to drop them into his lap. „Tell me what the _fuck_ happened. How come Diavolo knows about my _affliction_? I thought I was more than clear about the secrecy of the matter.“

The doctor watched him with a careful eye. „And I thought I'd been more than clear about the importance of telling your partner about the bond, but it seems like you disregarded my advice anyway. This is no laughing matter, Lucifer. You know that.“

Naamah walked over to Lucifer and lifted her hand. Before she could so much as touch him, Lucifer gripped her wrist tightly. „What do you think you're doing?“ he brought out and the doctor simply sighed.

„I am going to check on your head wound again, okay? Which, by the way, is also the reason why you're here in the first place. Lord Diavolo carried you here, looking like a fresh corpse. You should thank him, you know that, right? Actually,“ she then added, „I think you owe him a bit more than just an apology. An explanation would be a good start.“

Quickly, Lucifer let go of Naamah's wrist and let her examine the wound on his forehead. For a moment, they both kept quiet as she did her work quickly and efficiently.

Eventually, Lucifer visibly deflated. Although he knew showing any sign of weakness was against his own moral compass, in this moment he knew he could allow himself a tiny moment of existential dread. After he felt a bit more calm again, Lucifer asked about the one thing that kept on haunting his mind. „Did you tell him?“

Naamah rummaged through a drawer before shutting it closed again. „I didn't have to. He saw your pact mark.“

Lucifer froze in place.

He had tried so hard to remain his composure, had removed himself from Diavolo whenever it was needed and had burned even the smallest inadequate thought about his superior down to a burnt crisp, yet in the end, none of his efforts had born any fruits.

In spite of all his efforts, Lucifer had failed ever so miserably. Although it was no laughing matter, he suddenly felt the inexplicable urge to break out in laughter. The strangest of sensations ran through his body, and before he knew what was going on, he felt the sigil burning hot against his flesh. Lucifer hissed and ran his cold fingers over the back of his neck. It was a wrong, feverish heat and all at once, he was nauseous to the core.

The doctor stopped in her tracks and watched Lucifer with a professional eye. „I wish I could be of more help, but there's only so much I can do. You probably know this already, but at this point your head wound is the most insignificant of your problems. You have a concussion, but except for that, you're doing alright. The real issue is your sigil. It's tainted.“

„Tainted? What is that supposed to mean?“

The paper on the examination table rustled eerily in the otherwise silent room as Lucifer adjusted his position.

„It means that you have to make a choice. Actually, it's a choice that's long overdue. If you don't act quickly your life will be in danger. Unclaimed bonding marks are no joke. Not even your body will be able to withstand this game of cat and mouse that you've been playing,“ Naamah said loud enough for only Lucifer to hear, but too quiet for it to echo through the room.

Although the door was closed the walls were still terribly thin, and knowing her wife, there was always the slightest chance that someone was secretly eavesdropping at the door.

„I am no fan of blaming my patients whatsoever, but if you had listened to me from the beginning, you wouldn't be in this mess right now. This is why communication is key. Switching between seeing your partner and avoiding him is literally the worst thing you could do in this situation, and I'm convinced this is exactly what happened here with you. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong though.“

„You-“ Lucifer started, but stopped himself before he could act irrationally, his hand clenched to a tight fist. Getting angry wouldn't solve anything. No matter how offended Lucifer felt by the way this daring doctor was talking to him, he had to admit that her honesty was refreshing. After all, no lies had been told until now.

Instead of choosing to stray as far away from Diavolo as possible, Lucifer had remained by his side -although reluctantly- and had toyed with the magimeds which were supposed to make his life easier and the symptoms better. He had never been one to dismiss the possibility of consequences to his actions, so this revelation nearly didn't shock him. Perhaps, he had seen it coming all along. Had he not been prepared to go down for Diavolo right from the beginning?

In the end, Lucifer was no ordinary demon. What killed others made him only more vicious. Like an abandoned mutt, he refused to go down purely out of spite.

Lucifer's eyes, lit up with a new, absurd sort of dedication, met with Naamah's. „There is nothing for me to correct there, doctor. You are right in your assumptions. There are certainly consequences for my mistakes, so tell me, how much time do you reckon I have left?“

The ticking of a clock echoed through the half-empty room. Lucifer carefully touched his forehead, right where the doctor had placed a band-aid on the already healing head wound.

Naamah simply stared at him incredulously for a few more moments. In the end, she resigned herself to a singular defeated sigh. She was more than used to headstrong demons. However, no demon could rival Lucifer when it was about being stubborn and proud. From the look on his face down to his posture, one thing was clear: there was no way in hell Lucifer would change his mind. By now, it was set.

„Depends on how careful you are. Rule of thumb is the more time you spend with your bond partner without having fulfilled the bond, the quicker the rot starts taking over your body. It's like a parasitic infection.“

Lucifer stroked his chin with his thumb and pointer. „Hm. Alright,“ he mumbled, clearly already lost in his own plans. „Alright.“ This could still go his way. This simply had to go his own way. After all, he was one to command and demand. He wouldn't just buckle under the pressure of fate. Whether it was life or death, whatever was to come would have to take him kicking and growling. Lucifer had never been one to capitulate nicely.

Upon seeing Lucifer's calculated reaction, Naamah knew at once that no matter what, he would neither listen to her nor change his plans.

„As your doctor, I can only advise against what you're about to do.“

Lucifer raised his eyebrows questioningly. „What exactly would that be now?“

She sighed. „I don't know any details, but it's practically written on your face that you've reached a decision. Be smart, Lucifer. Please.“

She received no answer. She had expected as much, but still felt her eye twitch in annoyance faced with this demon's stubbornness. With an exhausted sigh Naamah wiped her brow before walking over to the door, opening it and calling out. „You can come back in, Lord Diavolo! Oh, and could you bring my wife with you?“

As Diavolo walked in, closely followed by Preta, the doctor seemed to relax considerably. „Sweetheart, did you school Lord Diavolo thoroughly?“

Preta's curls bounced as she nodded her head. „Yep! Told him everything he needs to know 'bout caring for concussed patients!“

A tiny smile spread on the doctor's lips as she watched her ever so lively wife. „Thanks, dear.“ She focused back on Lucifer and Diavolo.

„You two should be ready to go. There is nothing left for me to do here, so all I can do is prescribe you a lot of rest and most of all, a break from work until I can fully clear you, you hear me?“

Lucifer crossed one leg over the other, the perfect image of power and strength if it weren't for his body's current weakness. „That certainly isn't necessary, doctor. I heal rather quickly. In the blink of an eye, this will have passed,“ he announced.

„Normally, yes. You, however, are a special case. Your body is _preoccupied_ , so your healing rate is at an abnormally low level.“ She waved her hand towards Diavolo. „Which is why I asked my wife to give Lord Diavolo a quick rundown on what to look out for. Someone needs to keep an eye on you, and he seems more than capable.“

Lucifer stopped dead in his tracks.

Life was a circus and he was the underpaid ringmaster.

The sound of Diavolo's huge, leathery wings flapping in the night was closely followed by the sharp clacking of heels hitting solid ground.

„Diavolo?“

„Yeah?“

Lucifer cleared his throat abashedly. „You can let go of me. Have we not arrived?“

Diavolo's hands were still wound tightly around Lucifer's torso, holding him so close he could almost feel his heartbeat. How dearly he wished to be allowed to hold on forever.

„If you can stand I will let go of you,“ Diavolo said as he grabbed Lucifer's face with one hand and mustered it as if it were an open book.

After a short moment he slowly released Lucifer, who crossed his arms, turned his head away from Diavolo and huffed out a puff of air before he let his hand roam over the back of his neck. „Of course I can stand.“

„You have a concussion.“

„I merely slipped.“

Diavolo took in a deep breath, frustrated, and crossed his arms as well, accidentally mimicking Lucifer's pose. „Lucifer you almost bled out!“ he forced out and his voice came out louder and more upset than anticipated. He cleared his throat, took a miniscule break and stared at his right-hand man with glowing eyes. „You need to take better care of your health. If you won't I might find myself forced to do it for you.“ He paused, took a step forward and pushed Lucifer softly against the brick wall of the house of lamentation, one hand on Lucifer's shoulder, the other straight against the brick wall.

Lucifer didn't waver. He didn't break eye contact with Diavolo, both of them stubborn and headstrong. For a moment, all he could hear was his own heartbeat thundering in his ears. The sigil on the back of his neck felt like it was trying to burn through his bones, down into the very core of his being. Perhaps, it had already managed to do exactly that.

Lucifer grabbed Diavolo by the wrist, still not breaking eye contact. „I don't need pity. If this is why you're acting so strangely, don't. I can manage on my own. This whole situation is entirely my fault. You can drop your misplaced sense of duty, I don't need it,“ he brought out with an eerily calm composure. „I don't need anyone,“ he added, so quiet it was barely audible.

His body was warm under Diavolo's fingers and rigid against the wall. Perhaps, Lucifer allowed himself the smallest of moments to think how it could be if things were different. He trampled those thoughts as quickly as they'd sprouted from his mind. Was he this weak already, weak enough to foolishly fall back into delusional daydreams? Things would never be different, not for him, never. Happiness had never been his to claim. The last of his childish hopes and dreams had went up in flames the moment his little sister went out like the purest of flames.

Not that he needed happiness. All he needed was himself. There was no one else he should have to rely on, he was plenty powerful already.

Suddenly, Lucifer felt himself brought back to reality as Diavolo straightened his back and took a step back. The air filled with the familiar scent of smoke as he changed out of his demon form and his majestic wings disappeared again. „Let's go inside.“

Lucifer kept quiet for another second, mentally reminding himself of all of the reasons why he shouldn't let Diavolo inside. Not after what had happened last time.

A tiny laugh escaped Lucifer's lips. „Just like that night, huh,“ he said quietly, his eyes travelling up to the starry sky. He felt the immature need to let out a good, strong curse word.

„Like what night?“

Instead of an answer, Lucifer let out a growl. His sigil was burning up and his head felt as if he'd had an unfortunate meeting with smooth alabaster tiles. Oh wait.

His eyebrows pulled together and his hand shot up to the back of his neck.

Of course, Diavolo noticed the change in Lucifer's behaviour. Hell, he'd watched him like a hawk ever since they had left the doctor's house. To be precise, Diavolo had watched Lucifer with that one particular look in his eyes ever since he'd woken up. It was a strange look to describe, after all, Diavolo was quite good at hiding his honest thoughts.

„Lucifer, are you alright?“ Diavolo asked, suddenly far too close again. He gripped Lucifer's shoulders, almost as if he was afraid he'd faint. Lucifer could feel his eye twitch with an onset of annoyance.

„You don't need to worry about me. I'm neither weak nor frail, Diavolo. I'm not going to shatter into pieces the moment you take your eyes off me.“

„That would be quite the foolish thing to think, wouldn't it? However-“

Diavolo put the palm of his hand onto Lucifer's forehead and held it there for a moment. It felt like hot coal against his cold skin. „You have a concussion and we've been out in the cold for far too long already. Let's get you inside.“

Irked by the sudden change of subject, Lucifer furrowed his eyebrows and looked at the demon prince, who still hadn't removed his hand. He stared at him for a moment or two, once again uncertain as to what exactly Diavolo's intentions were. Why would he still feel so comfortable around Lucifer, after everything that'd happened? And even more importantly, why didn't he feel the need to comment on the most pressing issue at hand: the fact that Lucifer had formed a bond with him by accident. After all, it wasn't like Lucifer had caught just a simple cold, no, he had done something unspeakable and highly inappropriate. Although unplanned, it was still completely and undeniably his fault.

Before Lucifer's traitorous mouth could slip and ask Diavolo right then and there about it, he caught himself. There was no need for it, after all. Diavolo didn't owe him any explanations after all. Pushing the prince's hand aside, he nodded his head. “As you wish,” he replied rather coldly and his fingers twitched restlessly.

The house of lamentation seemed to be as lively as usual. Even from the outside, you could tell that most of the brothers were still up and going. For that exact reason, per Lucifer's request, Diavolo and Lucifer were entering through the back door.

After all, they looked quite a mess and it wasn't an everyday occurrence for Lucifer to arrive, covered in dried blood, his forehead plastered with a stark white band-aid, followed by none other than Lord Diavolo himself, who refused to leave him alone.

So they had found themselves having to revert back to sneaking around like teenagers up way past their bedtime.

They turned corner after corner with Lucifer leading the way and luckily for them, they didn't cross ways with any of Lucifer's brothers until they had already arrived in front of Lucifer's room. Mammon just rounded the corner when Lucifer grabbed Diavolo by his tie and pulled him into the room. The door fell shut behind them with Lucifer still holding tightly onto his superior. As he realized the situation he'd put the both of them into, he quickly let go again.

“I apologize. I really don't want to risk any on my brothers seeing me like this right now.” With one hand, Lucifer pushed his hair back, and his fingers caught onto several strands of hair, glued together with dried blood. At once, he felt disgusting and dirty and unkempt. This was anything but seemly. However, nothing about his current situation was even remotely seemly whatsoever.

Diavolo, leaning against the door, watched Lucifer closely and noted the way Lucifer once again seemed to shiver in his thin turtleneck. Without any hesitation, Diavolo lit the fireplace with a snap of his fingers. Caught off guard, Lucifer looked up.

“You didn't have to do that,” he said.

“I know,” Diavolo answered with a small smile on his lips when in all honesty, he'd have preferred to embrace Lucifer until every single cell of his being was filled with Diavolo's fiery heat. But he couldn't allow himself to think in such ways.

“You also don't need to stay here. I am absolutely fine. You can leave, Diavolo. I don't need your help.”

“This, I don't agree with. Have you already forgotten what the good doctor told you?” A cheeky grin spread across Diavolo's face. “You can't get rid of me that easily, Lucifer. You're stuck with me until you're all better.”

Lucifer shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. All he wanted was to be left alone right now. It had been quite the adventurous evening and in addition to his pounding head and tingling sigil, his body felt tired and lethargic. He crossed the room, went over to his closet and pulled a few items out of one his neatly organized drawers, his back turned to Diavolo.

“I suppose there is no convincing you otherwise?”

Diavolo walked over to Lucifer, reached out to touch the side of Lucifer's face, but retracted his hand before it could make contact. Instead, he slapped his hand onto Lucifer's shoulder. “You know me too well, dear friend. Now let's get you lying down. Doctor's orders.”

A disgusted look rushed over Lucifer's face. “Diavolo...I hope you don't really expect me to lie down in my own dirt? I am practically bathed in blood. I am taking a shower.”

Lucifer turned to his bathroom, hand already on the doorknob. He stopped in his tracks as he sensed Diavolo following him. Of course. He took a deep breath and raised an eyebrow.

“Really?”

“What if you collapse while you're in there? We can't have that now, can we? I'm coming with you.”

Today had already been embarrassing enough. What was a little more?

Lucifer allowed himself a minute more in the shower than he usually would. Today, he had definitely earned this little luxury. Steam was rising around him as for the first time that day, he was able to allow himself to relax a bit. Streams of water, almost too hot in temperature, were falling onto him in thick droplets, cleansing him from head to toe. Lost in thought, Lucifer ran his fingers through his hair, back around to his neck, along the sharp edges of his shoulders.

Then, he heard the slightest movement from behind the shower curtain. “Lucifer?” Diavolo asked, loud and clear.

Lucifer held back the need to slam his head against the shower tiles. He couldn't risk a second concussion. “Surprisingly, I have not slipped and died, Diavolo,” he brought out instead as he turned off the water and opened the shower curtain. He wasn't worried about Diavolo seeing him naked whatsoever. After all, there wasn't anything he hadn't already seen before.

Diavolo was sitting cross-legged against the bathroom door, his eyes covered with both of his hands. The sight almost made Lucifer chuckle. _Almost_.

After Lucifer had dried off and changed into a silken bathrobe, he took some time to watch the demon prince for the smallest of moments, observed him as he sat against the door with his eyes shielded, ever so hell-bent on allowing Lucifer privacy while simultaneously pushing his boundaries in a way no one else would ever dare to.

The bonding mark twitched dangerously as he couldn't help but find Diavolo _endearing_. Suddenly, shadowy worms started crawling through Lucifer's skin, wriggling back and forth.

With quick strides, Lucifer walked over to the mirror hanging over the sink, turned around and dropped the bathrobe off his shoulders so that his neck was exposed. As his eyes fell upon the sigil, dark red and intimidating in appearance, encased with ink black roots and blotches, Lucifer couldn't help but let out a flurry of colourful curses, which alerted Diavolo immediately.

He jumped up as soon as he heard the sound leave Lucifer's lips, but stalled in his tracks as he saw Lucifer standing in front of the mirror, bathrobe slid off his shoulders, with his neck craned as he traced his fingers across the sigil Diavolo had only seen once before. The look on his face was unreadable, but certainly strange.

“Lucifer,” Diavolo finally started. He stepped closer to Lucifer, who quickly pulled up his bathrobe and retied it to look at least somewhat less dishevelled.

With shaking hands, he smoothed over the fabric of the bathrobe. “What is it?” he asked, his voice icier than usual. It was easy to see that this was a conversation he was not looking forward to have.

For a moment, Diavolo didn't know how to bring up that one specific topic. Although they were close friends, there had always been a certain boundary between the both of them. Now, he feared, if he continued this conversation, that boundary would inevitably crumble to the ground. Still, Diavolo couldn't forget the sight of Lucifer, limp on the ground, followed in quick succession by the close-up of a strangely familiar sigil, tainted black, on the nape of Lucifer's elegant neck.

And all of a sudden, just like that, the words that had been begging to be released left Diavolo's lips without much hesitation.

“Why didn't you say anything?”

Lucifer froze in his steps. Slowly, he turned around to Diavolo. What was he supposed to say? Suddenly, the damp air felt suffocating instead of comforting. The room was silent except for the dripping of water off the shower head. Although he was nothing near a coward, Lucifer would pay much money to be anywhere but here right now. He had known that sooner or later, he would have to explain himself. Still, that didn't make things easier.

Lucifer pushed wet strands of hair out of his face and forced himself to relax his shoulders. “Let's not do this here,” he said as he opened the door and looked back at Diavolo. He nodded his head towards the door and lead the way, arms crossed and mind far away, back to his room.

Lucifer and Diavolo were sitting on pure white armchairs near the fireplace, face to face. Lucifer was leaning back, one leg crossed over the other, but the unnatural rigidity of his body betrayed his otherwise calm demeanour. Diavolo, on the other hand was leaning forward, his elbows resting on his knees, his sole focus the demon in front of him.

Lucifer took in a deep breath. “You were confused as to why I didn't say anything,” he started and let his hand travel upwards to touch the back of his neck again.

He hated that he had to do this. He hated that the right words failed to come out and seemed to be stuck in his throat. “After I found out about _it_ , I decided to solve this problem by myself. I didn't want to burden you. After all, this is my problem. I didn't see why I should make it yours as well.”

Diavolo didn't move. The expression on his face was serious, mixed in with something else. “Lucifer,” he eventually said quietly. He stood up and crossed the small distance between the chairs. Without hesitation, he caught Lucifer's hands between his own and dropped down next to him. His eyes were big and pleading, shiny like ancient coins, as he looked up at his right-hand man. “What did I do?”

Confused, Lucifer stared down at Diavolo, his cheeks undeniably dusted with a red tint as he took in the sight of his superior on his knees before him. “What did _you_ do?”

“I must've done something to make you distrust me. Otherwise, you would've come to me. How often do I have to tell you that you can rely on me as well?” As Diavolo held onto Lucifer's hands, he let his fingers glide along cold skin, drawing small patterns with his fingertips.

Lucifer's sigil sent a powerful shiver down his spine, almost painful in its intensity. “Diavolo, this is not your fault. I am to blame here. I am the one who overstepped, therefore I shall bear the fruits of my own weakness,” he mumbled, admittedly distracted by the way Diavolo's big hands felt on his own. This had to stop. “I am dealing with this.”

All of a sudden, Diavolo looked up. “But are you really? Shouldn't you be getting better by now?”

For a moment, Lucifer's eyes travelled across Diavolo's face, searching. Something felt off. Was Diavolo teasing him? Or was he perhaps mocking him?

The sigil sent painful shock waves through Lucifer's body and before he could stop himself, he flinched noticeably.

Concerned, Diavolo let go of his hands and raised his hand to Lucifer's neck, but before he could reach it, he was interrupted.

Lucifer had grabbed Diavolo's wrist and was now staring at him with an expression very close to shock. “Don't,” he stated plainly. He could feel inky black roots grow taller, could feel them crawl under his skin along his neck, down to his shoulders. His skin felt like it had been injected with poison.

“Please, just let me help you Lucifer. You don't have to do this all by yourself.”

And there it was again. Whenever he thought he had found a way out, Diavolo managed to pull him back down even further.

Before he could stop it, a sarcastic laugh escaped Lucifer's lips. “That is the entire point. I _have_ to do this by myself, you should know that better than anyone else.”

“Lucifer, why should I-”

“But as usual, you have to stir up trouble and make this difficult for me.” Lucifer let go of Diavolo's hand and quickly stood up. He turned Diavolo his back. “Pray tell, how will you help me with my _unclaimed_ bond?” There, he finally said it. The word felt raw and exposed in the air. “I can't even seem to keep my distance from you,” he forced out and rubbed the sigil. “And do you know what's even more preposterous? If I did, this problem could be solved quite easily!” Lucifer started pacing the room. “I have become such a fool,” he muttered.

Diavolo crossed the room in quick strides, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion and worry. He grabbed Lucifer by the wrist and pulled him back around. “Lucifer, what are you talking about? What do I have to do with-”

Lucifer tried to pull his wrist free, but found himself unable to. His head was heavy and his body felt aflame. Then there was a certain emotion filling his heart that he hadn't felt in a long time.

 _Shame_. He felt ashamed. If only he had managed to keep his emotions locked away in that little pandora's box in the back of his mind back then. But he just had to be selfish.

He looked up and his eyes, burning with humiliation, met with Diavolo's.

“Lucifer-”

“Don't feign ignorance,” he growled. “I know that doctor told you all about _our_ bond.”

Diavolo stopped dead in his tracks and his grip around Lucifer's wrist loosened considerably. Did he just hear correctly?

“Our bond?” he asked quietly.

Lucifer used one arm to prop himself up against the wall as the pain in his neck suddenly doubled in intensity and his legs threatened to buckle. His breath came out ragged and heavy. “Whose else?”

Diavolo finally awoke from his momentary shock and looked back at Lucifer. His heart was beating wildly and his hands had started shaking again, but he ignored both in favour of rushing to Lucifer's side.

“I don't need your-”

“What are you talking about?!”

Lucifer's head shot up and his eyes locked with Diavolo's, his own confusion perfectly mirrored in Diavolo's facial expression. He remained silent.

After a few moments, Diavolo straightened his back and raised his head. His eyes were shining like liquid amber in the light of the fireplace as he pressed Lucifer against the wall. He helped him stand up, one arm supporting his waist while his other hand had gripped Lucifer's face.

Diavolo, with a beating heart and a mind upset at what had just been implied, finally asked the one question he had felt too reluctant to ask before, afraid to receive an answer he couldn't bear to hear.

“Lucifer. Who did you bond with?”

The ticking of an ancient clock filled the room as Lucifer stared at Diavolo's fiery expression, for the first time unable to deny what was fact.

“You.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heya! It's been a while!  
> Anyway,writer's block yeeted me into super mega hell and then I kept on changing what I had written, so I am sorry for that, but it was most definitely needed.   
> I most definitely once again decided to be unnecessarily dramatic, but hey, at least I didn't hurt Lucifer again. So I guess that's a win then?  
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, comments,kudos and criticism are always appreciated! as always, you can also find me on tumblr @leviathanswingman   
> Also, since I'm uploading this on the 31st at like 5am, I already wish all of y'all an amazing new year's eve. Next year is going to be better, this is a threat!


	10. Side By Side

He kept his head trained to the ground, remotely embarrassed about having raised his voice like that with Diavolo of all people. But perhaps, he felt even more embarrassed about finally having acknowledged the truth.

Lucifer was ever so aware of Diavolo's hand on his waist, keeping him upright whilst not applying too much pressure. And despite their current circumstances, Lucifer's mind still wandered to forbidden, almost blasphemous places. Stolen kisses in hidden corners of RAD, hands sliding slyly into the back pocket of the other, jewellery exchanged to symbolize something far greater. All things that could have been if it weren't for their positions. Had it not been for Diavolo's strange reaction, perhaps his mind would have travelled even further.

Now, in addition to his mind's apparent inability to keep things prim, proper and professional, he had to battle with the implications of Diavolo's strange behaviour. If he hadn't been told in person that his secret had been exposed back at the doctor's office, Lucifer would've almost found himself assuming that after all, Diavolo hadn't known about their bond to begin with. But that simply couldn't be what was occurring here after all.

However, after having seen Diavolo's raw reaction, although it seemed utterly impossible and utterly illogical, Lucifer had to accept this uncomfortable truth. If he had kept his mouth shut, Diavolo would have remained none the wiser.

Somehow, the doctor had kept his secret and told Diavolo everything except for who exactly Lucifer's pact partner actually was.

For once, Lucifer found himself at a loss for words. Diavolo stared at him, expression intense and his hold strong.

„Lucifer, this doesn't make any sense. Why would-“

Lucifer averted his gaze.

„When-“ Diavolo took a small break to compose himself. „For how long have you know?“

To say that Lucifer felt incredibly awkward would be an understatement. He felt _embarrassed_. If anything, this was the world's biggest sign that he was unfit to be Diavolo's right-hand man. After all, he'd failed at the simplest of tasks: Keeping things professional.

In search of a distraction to make all of this easier, to make it less painful than he knew it would irrevocably turn out to be, his eyes wandered across the room spread out behind Diavolo's towering form. White armchairs, a fireplace with slowly dying embers, Lucifer's record player and next to it, his collection of various cursed vinyls. With a deep breath, he finally started talking.

„I've known since the day before the meeting. I was at the doctor's the day before because I'd been feeling particularly strange.“ His eyes were still trained on his surroundings instead of Diavolo. This did not have to be painful at all, he tried to convince himself.

„The day before the meeting? Lucifer...“

„Yes. And I'm not sorry, Diavolo. I did what had to be done.“

Lucifer took hold of Diavolo's hand that had been resting on his face, and brought it down slowly. As he tried to let go of it, Diavolo grabbed onto it instead.

„What do you mean, you did what had to be done?! Lucifer, why didn't you say anything?I would've-“

In spite of his composed demeanour, Lucifer could feel himself lose his cool. He could feel the way his heartbeat fluttered in a hasty rhythm against his skin, right where Diavolo was holding onto his wrist.

Perhaps, Diavolo could feel its fluttering beat himself. And that just couldn't be happening.

„You would have felt responsible. Because that is how you are, Diavolo. I refused to put that sort of pressure onto you. After all, the bond is unreciprocated and you cannot be blamed for it.“

Lucifer's heart ached foolishly, inconsolably, yet he refused to move. He could feel the bond pulsating, urging him to get close, get so much closer, but that was the one thing he certainly couldn't do.

Diavolo pushed closer to Lucifer's body with a certain tremble to his hands. „Lucifer, please. Can't you at least look at me? I understand the situation you are in, but do you dislike me so much that you can't even look me in the eye?“ His voice sounded strange, almost desperate. It made Lucifer's heart jump and his sigil burn with shame.

Apparently, in spite of all his efforts to cover up the whole issue, it had all come back to bite him in the ass all over again.

His limbs were shaking terribly as he tried desperately to deny his body what it actively wanted to pursue. Usually, Lucifer would have written it off as his sigil making him act in ways he would never even dare to, but in the end even he had to admit; would his body and mind really be reacting in such strong ways if he didn't desire Diavolo just as strongly?

Lucifer took a deep breath before he pried Diavolo's hand off his wrist and raised his head to meet Diavolo's eyes again. He placed his hands on Diavolo's shoulders instead, unsure if this was alright, not sure if he wasn't going too far.

„Better now?“ he asked as he took note of the look in Diavolo's eyes. Another tremor shook him harshly. He managed to conceal it easily, after all, pain was a thing most demons were quite familiar with. Still, certain parts of his body pulsated, almost as if past memories of Diavolo's hands on his body had turned into feathery memories, ghosts of long past touches.

His lips, hands, neck and shoulder blades were tingling ever so softly and sweetly, begging Lucifer to do the right thing with sugar-coated whispers, begging him to just move forward and do that one logical thing. But he just couldn't. He shouldn't be daring enough to allow himself to ruin Diavolo's future with one single touch too much.

„No,“ Diavolo intercepted unexpectedly. „Nothing feels better now, Lucifer. You are not alright, I can feel it. And you are right, I do feel responsible, because I've done you wrong.“ He cupped Lucifer's cheeks and stared at him intensely. „Apparently, I haven't cherished you enough.“

„Diavolo, I have told you before, you don't have to force yourself to-“

„Why would I need to force myself to feel anything when it's about you, Lucifer?! How could I have known that you have been reciprocating my feelings all this time? All I ever wanted was for you to feel safe. I have loved you from the moment I first laid eyes on you!“

Lucifer's heart stopped a beat as he saw the way Diavolo's eyes almost sparkled with sincerity. He flinched, and this time, he couldn't avoid hiding it. Diavolo would be able to tell that he was in pain by the way his fingers tightened on his shoulders and his knees buckled from the pain the unclaimed sigil caused him.

However, he didn't mind the pain at the moment, his mind was set on more important things. He couldn't help but let his thoughts cling onto the words Diavolo had just proclaimed, even if only for the shortest of moments.

 _Love_? Diavolo _loved_ him?

Lucifer's arms slid up Diavolo's shoulders, arms crossing over his neck as hands came to rest near his shoulder blades. A shuddered breath escaped his lips as he desperately tried to keep control of his body. He just needed another second, another minute maybe. Just enough time to regain his wits and return to his usual composed state. But alas, there was no one and nothing present allowing him such luxuries.

Lucifer's fingers twitched against Diavolo's skin.

Finally, he gave his body an inch of what it wanted. He let his chin rest on top of Diavolo's shoulder, right in the crook of his neck, in spite of how unseemly of an action it was. His heartbeat slowed down a bit, but his sigil still burned and wiggled with dark patterns tainting his pale skin. At this point, it felt almost too removed from himself to be labelled a burning sensation, it was more of a fiery pain instead.

“Diavolo,” he started, his reluctance waning by the minute. “I am ever so loyal to you. Please don't misunderstand my intentions. We both know I can't give you what you need. Let's not disillusion ourselves here.” Despite his words, his head sank down to rest in the crook of Diavolo's neck. Perhaps,this was one of the last times he could push past himself and act based on his emotions instead of cold logic

Lucifer's breathing grew heavier by the minute. The pride in his heart had finally come down to a blushing sizzle. The aching throbbing of the sigil had overtaken what was left of Lucifer's common sense. Still, he tried to fight against it, tried to stay reluctant, tried to keep up what was expected of him.

Then, suddenly, Diavolo's hand shot up, fingers slipping desperately into the smooth locks of Lucifer's hair while his other arm pulled his body even closer to his.

Diavolo's head slowly sank down, almost mirroring Lucifer's own. “You're all I ever wanted, how could you not see that? My heart has been aching for you all this time. Lucifer-”

“If we wait it out the bond will dissipate. It will cease to be a problem and you will be freed. If you can just be patient for once-”

Diavolo pushed back, staring at Lucifer's form. “Why would I want for the bond to disappear?Lucifer, the only reason why I left that night was because I did not want to ruin our relationship. I lo-”

Quickly, Lucifer pushed his pointer against Diavolo's lips, desperate to keep him from saying those words once again. He couldn't take to hear those words coming from him once again. They hurt too much. They were all he needed to hear, but were at the same time the one thing he was not allowed to accept, no matter of how fiercely the fiery core of his heart burned with passion and _want_.

“You appreciate me. And I am thankful for that.” He forced himself to stare into Diavolo's eyes as he gently pushed him back. The sigil practically burnt itself into his flesh and Lucifer groaned involuntarily. “But we both know you are destined to marry and become even greater than you are already. My place will always be by your side as your right-hand man. I would be a fool to ask for more.”

Rid of Diavolo's strong hold onto his body, Lucifer slowly slid to the ground. His neck burned to such an extent that he couldn't hold himself back anymore, his hand ran up to the back of his neck, clawing at the sigil. He could feel the way the mark strained against his skin akin to infectious worms wiggling under his skin, crawling and pushing their way around. Lucifer coughed to hide his discomfort.

“You can leave now, I will be alright.”

All he heard was the low buzzing of static in the room. The back of his neck had been aching and twisting for a while now, but he had somehow never gotten used to it. It felt wrong and invasive. All he wanted was to be left alone so he could fight the sigil off till the end of his days, which admittedly, was perhaps not too far away.

Suddenly, he felt strong arms pulling him up off the ground again.

Diavolo pulled him up and placed him on his bed. Without saying a word, he pulled the covers over Lucifer's body and left the room.

 _Perfect_.

Now, he wouldn't have to see Lucifer's downfall. After all, Lucifer had known for a while that that lonesome sigil of his would claim his life. And he had made peace with that. After all,this would allow him to leave this realm on his own terms. Perhaps from an outsider's point of view it would seem lonely and sad, but for Lucifer himself it was be the most agreeable of outcomes.

A low chuckle escaped his lips as he felt the way the sigil squirmed against his flesh. Perhaps, there was not much time left after all.

Lucifer would have liked to leave each of his brothers a letter as a parting gift, but right from the beginning, he had never been one to get what he wanted, cursed to be a pawn in games orchestrated by others.

And like this, in the end, he still longed for the demon prince's touch, no matter how inappropriate of a wish it was.

He was a demon, after all. No matter what he longed for, it was born to be a sin.

He brushed his bangs back with the palm of his hand and let out a huff of air as he thought about all the things he would have to miss out on. Lucifer's heart ached with all of the things he had never been allowed to say out loud.

Mammon finding love, Leviathan learning to accept himself, Satan abandoning some of the hate in his heart, Asmodeus finding peace and accepting his demonic form, Beelzebub letting go of all the regret in his heart, Belphegor accepting that peace was an option after all.

Although they didn't know, he loved them more than anything else. They were his brothers; his only family.

In the end, it seemed like they would have to be alright without him. Although they were all utterly disastrous, Lucifer knew they could pull it together. He had always had faith in them, even if he never expressed it verbally. Although he was tough on them, he loved all of them no matter what.

His heart beat faster and faster, beating in ways he had never felt okay with, beating like a heart attack waiting to happen.

Logically, he knew he didn't have much more time left. He had denied Diavolo for far too long for his sigil to be alright with it. Doctor Naamah had warned him about this and yet, he had stayed reluctant, had stayed strong and ever so resilient, no matter how much his body seemed to rebel against it because he knew what was expected of him. He was Diavolo's right-hand man, his most trusted of servants. There was no place left for love in this arrangement of theirs.

And still, he longed for a kiss, longed for strong arms pulling him in, no matter how deeply he knew that it was the one thing he could never agree to.

Because Diavolo had to be in relations with someone important to the Devildom. And that someone was an heir or an heiress, someone who was certainly not Lucifer.

Lucifer's disarrayed thoughts were unexpectedly interrupted by the sound of a door opening.

“Here you go.” Diavolo's voice came sounding through the room, deep, strange and unexpected. There was a certain tone to his voice Lucifer had never heard before.

A heavy blanket was thrown over Lucifer's body.

“You looked cold,” the demon prince's voice sounded throughout the room. “Please take it.”

Lucifer saw the way Diavolo looked at him after he had thrown the blanket over his body and promptly sat up again, mildly irritated.

“I already told you, you don't need to-”

“But what if I want to?” Diavolo's voice rang loud and clear through Lucifer's room. “I know you don't want me to be with you, so at least let me take care of you. Just let me do this one thing for you.” For a moment there was nothing but silence. “Just this once, please.”

Perhaps it was the sigil, or perhaps it was Lucifer allowing himself to be vulnerable just this once, but without much afterthought, he caved. “Alright,” he answered before he buried himself back in the covers and turned his back to Diavolo.

His hand, hidden under the heavy blankets, travelled up to his heart, where he could feel it beating ever so strongly. All he heard was static filling the room and for once, he knew his end was nigh and inescapable.

“I never wanted you of all people to know about this,” he started reluctantly, his voice uncharacteristically quiet. “I knew from the start that you would inevitably have to marry to improve your status.” Quietly, he buried his face further into the mattress, hoping that Diavolo wouldn't notice the way his heart beat to his chest, wouldn't notice it resonating in his chest wildly and dangerously. I never meant for it to end this way.”

“End this way?”

All of a sudden, Lucifer felt strong thighs straddling his hips. Careful hands unexpectedly came to cradle both sides of his face.

Somehow, Diavolo seemed to be slouching in a strange sort of way.

“Why should things end like this? Lucifer, you know I can help you out here, don't be so foolish!”

“You cannot help me here, Diavolo. I think the bond has made that fact excruciatingly obvious. Forcing yourself to adapt to certain facts has never been the way.”

“Why should I have to adapt to what I can prove is truth? You've heard Barbatos back then. Unclaimed bonds come to existence once partners fated to be bound to each other have failed to accept their feelings after years and years.” His hand slid down to rest near Lucifer's collarbone. “ I don't have it in me anymore to deny what I feel for you.”

Diavolo's hand slid further down to his own collar, unbuttoning his shirt hastily. He slid out of the sleeves, revealing a dark, intricate sigil burnt onto his chest, right above his heart, still timid and shy in its appearance.

“I've been aching for a while now, but I never knew the reason for it. Now I know why. My body was trying to alert me of what has been happening to you. And although I am mad, I can't fault you for having done what you did.” Diavolo smiled sadly as he let his hands drop down to the sheets. “It seems like we are caught up in the same sorts of dramatics.”

Slowly, Lucifer sat up, his right hand reaching out until it laid flush against Diavolo's soft skin. Without thinking he spread his fingers out, sensitive fingertips travelling across the soft lines of a newborn sigil placed upon Diavolo's chest. His own heart was still beating to his chest, terribly quick in its primal need to connect with what was so near yet so far away.

Lucifer lost himself in the patterns of familiar lines painted on a body he was more than acquainted with.

“How can this be?” he mused as he couldn't pry his eyes off the sigil on Diavolo's chest. It seemed ever so familiar to him, but seeing it on Diavolo's skin of all people, awoke something primal and needy deeply stashed away in the most hidden parts of Lucifer's soul.

He saw the look in Diavolo's eyes, saw the anger and the sadness, took note of all the emotions hidden deep inside that had been caused by no one else except for himself.

Reluctantly, he allowed himself to let his forehead rest against Diavolo's chest. “Now why would you show me this just now?” he then asked. He knew he should finally give up on those misplaced feelings of his once and for all, but truthfully, this was the one task he had always failed at colossally.

Diavolo looked down upon Lucifer's head resting against his exposed chest. His heart beat sickly and heavily. “I showed you the mark because I needed you to know.” His fingers twitched restlessly, but he refused to act upon his desires. This was not his move to make, no matter how much he longed for it, no matter how much he wanted to prove to Lucifer just how much he loved him. He had moved his chess pieces, now it was Lucifer's turn.

Lucifer took a shuddering breath as his sigil pulsed with need, with want, pulsed with the ferocity of a lonesome scream in the middle of the night, lost in dark woods.

And ever so unexpectedly, Diavolo's sigil felt hot to the touch in retaliation.

Lucifer felt like his body was sending him its last signals, similar to a cry for help. His head was aching, the back of his neck burned with desire and his limbs were shaking as he felt the unstoppable need to just push onward and let instinct overtake logic.

Lucifer saw the way Diavolo's face scrunched up in pain so similar to his own. It was hard to watch and just like that, Lucifer let out the slightest of chuckles as pain coursed through his veins, ever so impure and unnatural in the way it felt against his cold fingers on Diavolo's chest.

And just like that, Lucifer gave in, allowed himself to reach out with slender fingers finally burying themselves in thick locks.

Without even thinking about it, the pads of his fingertips grazed over the soft skin on the nape of Diavolo's neck. Lucifer took in the smallest of hesitant breaths before his lips grazed against Diavolo's.

He knew he should feel ashamed the moment he crossed that line, but really, he did not. Lucifer could let himself breathe freely for the first time ever since that night. Perhaps, grief would follow shortly after, but for the moment, he couldn't force himself to regret this bold move of his.

Without any hesitation, Diavolo reciprocated the kiss, his lips moving against Lucifer's in irrefutable desperation.

His hand rose up to cradle Lucifer's cheek lovingly as he rubbed his thumb across Lucifer's jawline.

Despite himself, Lucifer couldn't deny the way his body practically sighed with ease. After so long, he had finally given in to his most primal of instincts. His body felt like it was glowing with glee, and he certainly did not know what to do with that kind of sensation.

Still, he couldn't find it in himself to let go of Diavolo, even though the logical side of his brain seemed to yell at him to come back to his senses.

He let himself relax as he let go of all that had been holding him back before, even if for nothing more than a fleeting moment.

Lucifer let one of his hands roam upwards while the other found its place resting up against the demon prince's chest, and allowed himself to take hold of Diavolo's face as if he was really _his_ to touch. Eyes closed, he pulled even closer and deepened the kiss as he moved his lips against intoxicatingly smooth ones, so forbidden in nature, yet so familiar in reality.

Suddenly, Diavolo pulled back and for the first time in a while, both of them felt comfortable enough to allow themselves to just look at each other.

In spite of all the years Diavolo had seen throughout his life, he now felt like a baby deer taking its first shaky steps.

“Lucifer?” he asked, almost hesitantly.

The demon in question crashed down as his arms encased Diavolo's neck and accidentally pulled him further down onto the bed with him.

And although he felt more than embarrassed, he didn't have it in himself anymore to deny their bond any longer.

He stayed like that for a moment, Diavolo's body pulled flush again his chest.

This was nothing like himself.

Lucifer tried to calm back down again as he was overtaken by the feeling of Diavolo's skin against his own. As he realized that he was faced with another impossibly harsh truth of the fates, his arms let go of Diavolo's form. He let out a deep sigh of breath as Diavolo raised his head again and placed a forbidden kiss upon the back of his hand.

And his heart fluttered. It _fluttered_. To think that he was even capable of feeling such intricate and sweet emotions.

Even though he had never planned to do so, his body let out a sound of satisfaction. Needless to say, he felt more than conflicted. He knew he shouldn't act in such ways, but still, he couldn't refrain from doing so. No matter how hard he tried to separate his emotions from all expectations placed upon him, he couldn't do so in the end.

Finally, Lucifer let his arms glide along Diavolo's muscular torso as his head sank down once again and his lips placed a kiss upon their sigil.

His eyes fluttered close, lashes softly bumping against each other ever so calmly. After so long, he felt the shame in his soul simmer down to a blissful sort of peace.

Diavolo remained silent as his fingers began to discover Lucifer's sigil, fingers gliding along strong lines. His eyes were big and curious, tainted by a hidden spark of uncertainty.

Finally, with his head buried in the crook of Lucifer's neck, he began to speak, his lips slowly gliding along his soft skin with every little syllable he uttered, words whispered so quietly not even Lucifer could grasp all of them to their full extent.

“Can't this be enough for us?”

Lucifer felt an unknown sort of sensation pulsing throughout his body, strange and new. He could feel loneliness filling him from head to toe, soaking through his skin and pulling him down as if he were wearing clothes in a swimming pool.

And all of a sudden, he knew. This sensation he felt was not his own, it was Diavolo's.

Surprised, he pushed Diavolo back by his shoulders. His quick heartbeat filled the sudden silence of the room and Lucifer simply stared at the demon prince, took in his widened eyes, flushed lips and a sigil that had quickly turned from blushing new lines to a deep shade of red.

“ _Can't this be enough for us?”_

The words Diavolo had uttered before were now echoing through Lucifer's mind as he saw the look on Diavolo's face, so raw, so open, so afraid.

And Lucifer couldn't keep up with his charade anymore. He wanted whatever this was, wanted it so desperately; had wanted it for so long.

The words slithered past his forked tongue and spilled out of his mouth before he could stop himself, first testingly, but then more self assured a second time. “Diavolo, I want you. More than anything in this world.”

“Lucifer, are you-”

He grabbed hold of Diavolo's hands and placed a chaste kiss upon them.

“I know I am forgetting myself, but I see no sense in hiding this truth anymore. You know me better than anyone else, there is no sense in hiding what I truly desire, even though it is preposterous for me to even dare saying those words to your face,” he finally brought out while keeping his head bowed low.

Diavolo, at first stunned by Lucifer's unexpected confession, carefully pulled back his arms, only to wrap them around Lucifer instead, pulling him closer to his body and closer to his heart.

Kind hands travelled up Lucifer's back as Diavolo let his head come to a rest in the crook of Lucifer's neck. He held onto him fiercely.

“Can't you see that you're everything I ever wanted? I never asked for status or wealth, all I ever longed for was to be allowed to be by your side.”

“Diavolo-”

“As long as you're by my side I know I'll be fine. Cities die and worlds crumble to the ground, but through all of it, I know you will always remain by my side, Lucifer. So please,” Diavolo's voice cracked ever so slightly as he remained still against Lucifer's shoulder, “do me this one favour and _stay_.”

Lucifer allowed his hands to roam freely and eventually hold onto Diavolo's back, feeling delicate shoulder blades rising up and down with every single breath against the palms of his hands.

In spite of Diavolo's heavy words, Lucifer's chest felt free. No guilt, no shame, barely any negative emotions appeared to be feeding off his mind.

He tightened his hold on Diavolo and buried his head in the crook of his neck, mirroring the demon prince's actions without any regrets.

Lucifer raised his head, cradled Diavolo's cheek with the feathery touch of one hand and placed a soft kiss on the side of his neck, right under his jawline before moving on to Diavolo's lips. All of a sudden, he felt confident in his decision, more confident than he had ever felt about anything else in his life, for this was one of the only decisions that was irrefutably his own to make. “Don't,” another kiss, more firm in nature, was placed upon Diavolo's lips, “ just accept mediocrity. I am ready to give myself to you fully. After all, I am ever so devoted to you. Most of all however,” Lucifer pulled back and paused for a moment, taking in the indescribable look on Diavolo's face. Then, he impulsively allowed himself to spill his guts.

“Most of all, my devotion has already transformed into something much more concerning decades ago.”

Diavolo's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

Lucifer could feel the way his fingers began to shake again, a reaction so unseemly faced with what he was honestly trying to confess. “What I seemingly fail to convey to you is the fact that I have fallen hopelessly enamoured with you.”

Diavolo shot up, all of a sudden much more present and indescribably shocked. “Really?! Lucifer, are you- this is not a dream now, is it?” His head turned from side to side as if he was looking for a hidden camera.

Quickly, Lucifer grabbed hold of Diavolo's right hand and place it upon the sigil on the back of his neck. In retaliation, he pushed his own left hand up against the sigil on Diavolo's chest and took a deep breath, finally letting go of all the resignations that had been shackling his heart.

Lucifer could feel their sigils resonate with each other, forming a bond, pretty like cherry blossoms falling during the birth of spring yet fierce like the angry flames of an unforgiving fire. Colourful sparks started to swirl around the two of them.

While Lucifer held his eyes closed, Diavolo slowly opened his own ones, unable to believe what was happening.

And what he saw robbed him of his breath. The room was illuminated by infinite particles, each of them different in colour, flourishing through the air, surprisingly careless and free. Lucifer looked calm and at peace with his eyes closed and his head tipped up to the ceiling. In Diavolo's eyes, he was glowing with brilliance and perfection.

Diavolo let out a low chuckle and placed his hands upon Lucifer's slender hips, pulling him as close as possible. It felt like the laughter in his chest would never burn down to sizzling embers as Diavolo relished in the warmth that was spreading all across his body, so utterly strange in a comforting and empowering way. As always, he could not tear his gaze off Lucifer, and for once, it felt alright for him to speak his mind as his fingers circled the sigil on Lucifer's neck, tingling ever so sweetly. Lucifer opened his eyes and they locked onto Diavolo's without any hesitation.

“Lucifer, will you believe me when I say that I am terribly in love with you?”

For the shortest of moments, there was doubt in Lucifer's eyes, perhaps even a good amount of panic. In spite of it all, Lucifer let out a little laugh, unedited and free and the corners of his mouth twitched in amusement. “I will certainly consider it,” he let out. “Under one condition.”

Diavolo nodded his head ever so fervently. There was nothing he wouldn't do for Lucifer.

“Tell me it's alright to stay by your side like this, Diavolo,” he answered, suddenly all too serious again. “Tell me I can allow myself a thing like that.”

Diavolo pulled Lucifer closer without any hesitation, pulling him partially onto his lap, soft hands travelling up his body lovingly, but carefully. He stared up at his right-hand man and smiled ever so openly. “If that is truly what you want, then I will be nothing but honoured to accept you as my fated companion. As long as you are willing to accept me accordingly.”

A rare and genuine smile spread shyly across Lucifer's face. “Of course,” he answered, his eyes trained on Diavolo's form. “Always.”

Quickly, he wrapped his arms around Diavolo's neck. After so much sorrow and pain, he could finally appreciate the way the demon prince's skin felt upon his own, so alluring and enticing, yet also so comforting. He could feel Diavolo burying his hand in the back of his silky locks and without any regrets, Lucifer pushed himself forward until he could finally appreciate the perfection that was Diavolo's skin upon his own and could taste the way Diavolo's lips sang unheard hymns of praise against his lips.

For once, neither Lucifer nor Diavolo felt fear nor uncertainty. Encased by the warmth of the aura their newly claimed bond provided, they found themselves rid of any worries, even if for the shortest of moments. After all, they would be alright as long as they could rely on each other's support. In the end everything would be alright if they remained, just like that, side by side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Call me sappy, call me a simp, but I really wanted to include a few more sweet moments admist the all of the angst i included in this fanfic. It feels sort of strange that it's all over now, but I am proud of myself nonetheless.   
> Love is a losing game was initially supposed to be a oneshot, but due to my apparent inability to keep my mouth shut this turned into another 30+k chapter fic.  
> I feel like this one is a bit more of a mess than killing me softly was, since I often just went along with my strange impulses, but I love it no matter what and I really hope that y'all could find some love for this brain child of mine as well.   
> Thank you so so much for reading and following this story, y'all really brightened up my days.  
> Kudos, comments and criticism are always appreciated and as per usual, come and follow me on tumblr @leviathanswingman if you enjoy people rambling in the post tags far too much.


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